All language subtitles for 04_c

Subtitles by explosiveskull

Good morning, Dottie.

Good morning, Sue Anne.

All right, thank you.
Not a problem.

Doctor.

Can you tell us
precisely what your fight

with McWatt on the tarmac
was about?

Happiness.

Happiness?
Your fight was about happiness?

That was one of the themes,
yes.

That's where it ended up,
anyway.

Would you say
that McWatt was disturbed?

Yes.

And would you say
he was mentally unwell?

Sure, yeah.
Yeah, why not?

Would you
call him insane?

Aren't we all?

And would you say McWatt's
insanity led to the death

of Kid Sampson?

Yes.

And would you
agree the United States

military is in
no way responsible

for McWatt's insanity that led
to the death of Kid Sampson?

I would say the United States
military is entirely

responsible for McWatt's
insanity that led to the death

of Kid Sampson.

Answer the question.

I just did.

Can you
positively identify these

to be the bodies of Lieutenants
Sampson and McWatt?

Positively?

Simply yes or no
will suffice.

Well, I can't really give you
a simple yes or no.

I'm...

20% positive that's
Kid Sampson, and I'm...

I don't know...

10% on McWatt.

I'll take that
as a yes.

- Thank you, bye.
- Oh.

Hi, hi.
Uh, can I talk to you?

Hi, sure.

So, I think maybe you and I
are the only two sane people

on this base.

Sane person? Here?
Okay.

I can't take this anymore.

And I think I've figured out
a way to get out of here,

and I just wanna see
how it registers

on a sane person's face.

Wow, I'm--I'm
almost flattered.

So, as it stands,
I still have 11 missions

left to fly.

Cathcart'll raise the missions,
clearly.

It's a behavioral pattern.

But I'm gonna do those 11
so fast in secret,

he won't even know.

And I won't log them
on the day.

I'll log them all at once
after I've flown them,

and then I'm gone before
he even knows what happened.

So, just to get this straight,
your--your plan to get out

of here is to fly all
of the missions

you're required to fly anyway?

Yeah, that's my plan.

Just, really fast.

Heya, fella.
Hey.

What say I fly
this one for you?

Why?
I don't know.

I'm just itching
to get up there.

All right.
I'm gonna go swimming, then.

Appreciate it.
Take that for me, will ya?

All right.

And...

Bombs away.
All right, that's it.

We're done.
Pull up.

Pull up harder,
please.

Hey, uh,
what's your name, again?

Munster.
Bobby Munster.

Nice job, Bobby Munster.

Bombs away.

Hey, there he is,
the king of the clouds.

Hey, fellas.

New Kid Sampson,
New McWatt.

John Yossarian.

John Yossarian.

Come on, you fuck.

Release.
Okay, take us out!

Heya, boys.
Let's do it.

Release.

Yes, that's it!
That's it for me!

I'm going home, fellas!

You hear that?

I'm going home.

What's your name, again?
Joseph, sir.

I'm going home, Joseph.
I won.

I won!

I hear someone's going home.
Oh, you hear right.

Go get 'em, Yo-Yo.

I will.

Hi.

Haven't seen you in a while.

Yeah.
Been in the hospital again?

I have not.
I have not, no.

I have been flying.

For your signing.

You're giving me these
all at once?

All at once.
There's 11 missions there.

Count 'em.

Interesting way
of doing it.

11 in a row.

I figure I'd save you a whole
lot of work if, you know,

I gave them to you all at once.

How thoughtful.

A good day to you,
Colonel.

This makes 50 missions, sir.

Wait, you've flown--

11 missions.

11 missions?

That's right, sir.
In six days.

That's not even possible.

That's 11 missions, sir.

They're--They're
all stamped, sir.

Who gave you permission?

I've just been making
myself available, sir.

There's always somebody
with the stomach bug

or a headache
or a hangover.

And I'm just doing
what I can to help.

Just doing my bit.

This is highly irregular.

Yes, sir.

And when can I expect
to receive

my discharge papers, sir?

Well, as soon as I've stamped
your paperwork.

Yes, sir.

Should I wait here?

There's a process
that proceeds

the actual stamping
of the stamp.

Yes, sir.

We'll notify you once that
process is complete.

Thank you, sir.
Is that sufficient?

Thank you very much,
sir.

You're welcome.

Uh-huh.

Yeah!

Hey, Yo-Yo!

What are you doing?

Oh, we went down.

I was on a training run
with these fellas.

Fellas, this is Yossarian.
Jump on, Yo-Yo.

We were--we were looping out
past Sardinia

in the new B-25.

It's got a new Holley
carburetor which cruises lean

but the bypass valve
is diaphragm-operated,

which I did not know.

The old ones have a baffle
in the air-mixing chamber

and that's the one I'm used to,
obviously.

But now there's this
self-sealing CCU

strapped on to the bomb bay,
and the fuel gets transferred

by an electric centrifuge pump.

And if you did not know that--

You're not gonna prime it.
So...

Perfect belly landing.

And I learned something
new for next time.

Well, I didn't
know you'd gone.

But welcome back.

Knock, knock.
How you doing, Yo-Yo?

Stupendous.

Heard you went
down yesterday.

Sure did.
Good for you.

I need to call in my favor.

What is it?

I'm gonna go
buy some things.

I need you
to come with me.

- Where?
- Everywhere.

- When?
- Gotta leave in an hour.

I can't.
I'm going home.

You're going home?

I'm just waiting on a stamp.

But, why do you need me?

Come on,
it'll be fun.

It'll be like a vacation.

You won't have
to lift anything heavy.

I promise.

Can I come?

Yeah, she handles nice,
right?

I'm impressed.

It's outstanding
craftsmanship.

That's the Germans
for you, though.

Every little detail.
Hey, look at this stitching.

Here, huh?
This is high-quality leather.

You see this, Yossarian?

Very high quality.

Hello, this
is Milo Minderbinder.

Ah, Luca.
How are you, my friend?

Wait, slow down, Luca.
Slow down.

Uh-huh.

Uh-huh.

Well, that was the agreement
we had, 500 goats.

Tell him to hold his horses.
I'm actually--

I'm in the neighborhood.
I'll drop in.

No, just tell him
not to slaughter.

No slaughter.
Don't kill the goats.

Mr. Milo.

It's so wonderful
to have you back.

Alessandro, I want you
to meet two very,

very good friends of mine.
This is John Yossarian.

Hiya.
Hi.

And Ivor Orr.

My friends.
My friends.

Alessandro,
we had an agreement.

Yes, yes.

But you said some goats.

You didn't say 500 goats.

500 goats is good, no?

You can milk them.

No, no, Mr. Milo.
We cannot feed them.

Don't they
just eat grass?

Let them eat the grass.

Oh, you don't understand goats.

The grass
is already gone.

And now
they eat everything.

They eat things
that are not even food.

Let me assure you,
we are so thankful

for everything you
have done for us.

And this town has most
surely been blessed

by your generosity.

You're very welcome.

But 500 goats,
it's just too many goats.

It's amazing the demand
you can create

just by moving things around.

That's what I do with the eggs.

Now--Now, I don't understand
what you do with the eggs.

You buy them for seven cents
apiece in Malta

then you sell them
for five cents?

I do it to make a profit.

Well, why do people come
to Malta for eggs

when they're so expensive,
there?

Because they've always
done it that way.

Why don't they go
look for eggs in Sicily?

Because they've never
done it that way.

Now I really
don't understand.

Why--Why don't you sell
your mess hall's eggs

for seven cents apiece
instead of five cents apiece?

Because my mess halls
would have no need for me then.

Anyone can buy seven cents
apiece eggs

for seven cents apiece.

And at least this way I can
make a bid for myself

as a middle man.

What?
So you do make a profit.

Ah, the syndicate benefits
when I benefit

because everybody has a share.

You'll see when we get
to Palermo.

I thought you said
we were going to Malta.

Ah, Palermo first.

You hear that, Orr?

Come on, fellas.
Let's go, guys.

What's sindacho?

Sindacho.
It means mayor.

I'm the mayor of Palermo.

How?

'Cause I brought Scotch
to Italy.

Well, since when do
the Italians drink Scotch?

They don't.
Scotch is very expensive.

These people are very poor.

Well, why are you importing
it if nobody drinks it?

To inflate the price.

Sicily's now the third
largest exporter

of Scotch in the world.

That's why they
elected me mayor.

That's why they
elected him mayor.

Good for you, Milo.

Grazie.

Ah, Giuseppe.

Telefono.

M&M Enterprises.
This is Milo Minderbinder.

Uh-huh, Fernando.

Okay.
Okay.

Yeah, we should.

We should absolutely do that.

Okay, all right.
Give me, uh, four hours.

Yeah, send my love to Marge
and the kids, okay?

Artichokes.
Insane prices.

I have to act fast.

I'll be back.
Don't wait up for me.

About fucking time.

Hi, fellas!
I'm so sorry!

I had to meet
the artichoke king.

He's in Gibraltar.
It's quite the hike.

Milo, we slept on goddamn
deck chairs.

I can organize a massage
in Malta.

Milo, what am I doing here?

We gotta chop-chop now, boys!

Ladies and gentlemen,
thank you.

Um, and, uh, we, um,
welcome tonight

a very special guest.
A very special friend.

And the first American
in over 120 years

to ever hold the title
of Assistant Governor General

of Malta.

Ladies and gentlemen,
I give you

Major Sir Milo Minderbinder.

Hear, hear!

Thank you, Governor General.

And ladies and gentlemen,
it is an absolute honor

to be here tonight.

These are a gift
for the Caliph of Oran.

What is Oran?

It's a city in Algeria.

It was founded by the Moors
in the 10th century.

Why are you giving
the Caliph of Oran

a plane full of parrots?

Because it's customary
for the Pasha of Oran

to give gifts to the Caliph.

And you're
the Pasha of Oran?

Oh, it's an
honorary title.

You know how these things go.

It doesn't actually
mean anything.

Ah, they're beautiful,
aren't they?

What are you
doing with them?

Well, Oran is where
I call in my favor.

Oran means one thing to me.

And that thing is dates.

Well, two things.

I'm thinking of taking out
some oil leases, too.

But today it's all about dates.

What dates?
Date dates.

The dates you eat.
They're a palm fruit.

Algerian dates are the best
in the world,

and this guy that we're
going to see--the Caliph--

he has a lot of them.
And I mean a lot of them.

Okay.

Now, the thing with this guy
is he's nervous.

Maybe it's an Arab thing.

Maybe he just wants a little
show of respect.

The Arabs are
an ancient people.

Ancient families doing business
with other ancient families.

Things move slow.

I think the speed
of American enterprise

gives him the willies.

And I'm guessing he just wants
to know that he's getting

into business with some
serious people.

So I told him I was bringing
my friend with me today.

My friend being a wealthy
American industrialist.

That wealthy American
industrialist being you.

Most high Caliph,

it is so wonderful
to see you again.

And you, too,
good Milo.

You are always welcome
in my house.

You have journeyed well.

You look radiant.

I feel radiant, Your Majesty.

Perhaps it is the fragrant air
of your magical country.

Perhaps it is,
good Milo.

Perhaps you should find a way
of bottling it

to take home with you
to America.

Indeed we should.

It would make my people
very happy.

Your Highness,
if you will,

allow me to introduce you
to a dear, dear friend.

Your Greatness,
it's my pleasure to introduce

to you a fantastically wealthy
American industrialist

from an ancient
American family.

Mr. Nelson D. Rockefeller.

Mr. Rockefeller,
it is such a great honor.

I have heard so much about you.

And I you,
great man.

Ah...

I is wonderful that you
are here today.

Come.

Thank you,
your greatness.

This war is a terrible
nuisance, is it not?

Oh, terrible.
Terrible nuisance.

- It's terrible.
- Terrible.

Mr. Rockefeller,

your negotiations in the
Mesopotamian Oil Agreement

of 1938,
I was most impressed.

You're very tough.

Yes, I am, Your Highness.

But fair.

The Sultan of Assur
is a difficult man.

Your powers of persuasion
must be formidable.

He was a tricky customer,
but we got there eventually.

I think you'll find
the Caliph to be

not nearly so difficult.

But I am a skilled
negotiator.

I must warn you.

As am I, Your Grace.
As am I.

Well, then,
and what do you think

the prospects of exploration
in my country might be?

Good.
Mm-hmm.

I think they'd be very good.

The Saharan Desert presents
its problems.

Oh, Sahara.
God forbid, so hot.

My concern would be not
so much the heat

as the possibility
of igneous layers

over the shale deposits.

They're a problem,
those igneous layers.

And how would you
approach that?

Technology.

And what technology?

The latest technology.

And what, pray tell,
is the latest technology?

I don't know, Your Honor.
I'm a businessman.

I'm not an engineer.

You're an oil man,
aren't you?

Surely you know how your oil
is extracted.

I don't--I don't really--

Our most recent experiences
with the igneous rock

were more than adequately
handled with the new

diaphragm-operated bypass valve
drill bit.

The regular drill bits
have a baffle

in the air-mixing chamber.

But the new ones have
a self-sealing CCU

strapped onto the electric
centrifuge pump.

My geologist.
Kid's a genius.

I'm happy for you.
You flew your missions.

You did your part.

When do you get to go home?

I'm not really gonna get
to go home

until this thing's done
and dusted.

I mean, I'm not gonna go home
the normal way.

The normal way?

Well, I'm never gonna
catch up to my mission quota.

Not at this rate.

You have a mission quota?

Yeah, we all do,
don't we?

Where's it at now?

50.

How many
have you flown?

Six, five.
Five or six.

Wow.

When this is all over,

we should go into
business together.

Well, back home?

Oh, yeah, sure.
Back home, everywhere.

And do what?

Buy things, sell things.

What, sell
amphibious vehicles

to the fishermen of Minnesota?

Sell everything to everyone.

Colonel Korn, sir.

What can I do for you?

I was just
checking in, sir,

about my, uh--my
discharge papers.

Ah, yes.
It was, uh--

It was almost the next thing
I was getting to.

Oh, that's great, sir.
This was--

Remind me, you were--
you were at 50 missions, huh?

Correct, sir.

Oh.

Oh, that could be a problem.
Hmm.

Why would that be a problem,
sir?

Well, the missions
were raised last night.

Didn't you hear?

No, uh, sir.

I was in Algeria, sir.

But--But this was already--
these were already put--

Yeah, but the paperwork
hasn't been processed yet,

as apparently is the case
in this instance.

My apologies.

And technically speaking,
you haven't been discharged.

And if you haven't
been discharged,

then technically speaking,
you're still on active duty.

And if you're still
on active duty,

then technically speaking,
you still have to fly

the number of missions
required of you

before you can be discharged.

And as of yesterday,
that number is 55, my friend.

But I did everything right.

It's been such a busy week.

That really is terrible timing.

And, you know what?
I sympathize.

I do.
But you know what?

Think about it this way, right?

Only five more to go.

Right? Yeah.

What is it you're
pretending is wrong this time?

I don't know.
Uh, nothing.

Well, did you manage
to secretly fly

all those missions?

Yeah, actually,
I did.

And then they raised
them again.

Well, you knew they would.

You expend a lot
of energy, don't you?

Apparently so.

Seems to me that you expend
a lot of energy

railing against things
that you can't control.

And who says
I can't control 'em?

This is war.

It's a law of nature that war
concentrates power in the hands

of those most likely
to abuse it.

Can't overcome that power
while the war's still on.

You just gotta hope
for it to end.

Oh, it's gonna end.

I just still wanna be alive
when it does.

Or, maybe rather than simply
hoping for it to end,

you could just fly
your missions.

Do whatever you can
to end it yourself.

Maybe.

Or maybe you can mind
your own business.

Yo-Yo.

I wanted to ask you something.

Oh, yeah?
What's that?

I'm gonna ask Clara
to marry me.

Nately--
Well, what do you think?

I think you're 24 years old,
and she's a prostitute.

Yeah, so?
I love her.

Doesn't that mean something?

It means you're not
thinking straight.

I've never felt clearer.

So you're gonna marry
an Italian whore,

you're gonna make a straight
woman of her,

and you're gonna drag her home
to Connecticut?

Connecticut?

What the hell
is the matter with you?

No, this is all amazing.
Here.

The life is amazing.
Sex is amazing.

Italy is the greatest.
We're gonna win the war.

And then I'm gonna use
the GI Bill to stay here,

marry Clara,
and open a restaurant.

You know how this works,
don't you?

You pay her money,
and she doesn't love you.

Well, you weren't there.
What would you know?

Nothing.
Nothing.

Oh, fuck, buddy.

You know, I was gonna ask you
to be my best man and all.

Look at this thing.

You're 24.
She's a prostitute.

She's a prostitute now.

She won't be once
I've married her.

Dang, buddy, I am telling
you something big here.

You're right.

This is great.

I'll be your best man.

I'm sorry.
I'm very happy for you.

Thank you.

How are we looking?

- Holding.
- Copy that.

That's what you
said a minute ago.

Nothing's changed.
We're holding.

Hey, that's the river,
though, right?

Yeah, that's the river.

So, is that
the bridge?

No, different bridge.

Well, how do you know we're
talking about the same bridge?

I'm talking about that bridge.

I don't know what bridge
you're talking about,

but it's not the bridge I mean.

But this
is the river, right?

I can't see any other bridges.

'Cause we're not there yet.

How far are we,
goddamn it?

- Close.
- What?

I said we're close.

Close to what?
The river or the bridge?

I'm seeing the river
down there.

Come on, guys.
Keep it together up there.

Come again, Bouncin' Betty,
over.

I'm seeing the river
down there.

He ain't talking to you,
Yo-Yo.

This is 7344,
approaching target, over.

What's going on?

Bouncin' Betty,
do you read me?

This is 7344
approaching target.

What's going on
with Bouncin' Betty?

Bouncin' Betty's
been hit!

She's going down!

Bouncin' Betty,
that's Orr's plane, isn't it?

Hey--Hey, Aarfy,
Bouncin' Betty is Orr's plane.

Yossarian, are you on
a steady heading?

We're approaching.

Yes, I'm on a steady heading.

Um, is that the bridge?

- What's Orr saying?
- Who's Orr?

The Bouncin' Betty pilot.

He says both engines are out.
He's taking it over the water.

Yossarian,
what's your drift angle?

Uh--

Uh, 12 degrees.

You gonna correct that?

Yes, I'm gonna
correct that.

Affirmative.

That's affirmative.

What's affirmative?

He ain't talking to you,
Yo-Yo!

I was talking
to Bouncin' Betty.

They're gonna ditch.

Shit.

Yossarian,
that's the bridge.

Are you releasing?

What? That's the bridge?

Yeah, that's the bridge.
That's the fucking bridge.

Fuck!

What happened?

He didn't drop the bombs.

He didn't drop
the fucking bombs.

Yankee Doodle, did you miss
your target and drop?

Yes, yes, drop.
God damn it.

God, son of a bitch.

God damn it.

Hey, did they hit the bridge?

Let's take a look.

They were following
your lead, Yossarian.

They released too late.

Shit.

Stunning work,
Yossarian.

Stunning work.

Cathcart'll have us straight
back up here tomorrow.

Fuck.
Turn us around.

What?

Turn us around.
We're going back.

Oh, you gotta be kidding me,
guys!

Back where?

Back to the target.

But what for?

To drop the bombs.

Are you serious?

Look, I didn't release,
and they all missed.

I'm really sorry, fellas.

Let's just blow the Christ
out of this fucking bridge

and go home.

Why don't we just go home?

Because I'm not coming back
up here tomorrow, all right?

Motherfucker.

This is Yankee Doodle.

We are, uh--we're turning
back to target

and we'll catch up with you.

Roger that,
Yankee Doodle.

Fly safe.

Christ.

God damn it.

All right,
holding at 4200.

Yossarian approaching quickly.
You got that?

I got it.

All right.

Holding steady,
266.

Okay, holding
steady. Holding course.

Holy shit.

30 seconds to target.

Holding.

Hold.

Come on, Yo-Yo!

Blast that bridge so we can get
the fuck out of this shit!

Hold.

Hold.

Hold still, you fuck.

And...

Release.

And we're off.

All right,
get us out of here.

Jesus Christ,
what the fuck was that?

Yo-Yo!

Nately!

Nately, are you okay?

Yo-Yo!
No!

Oh, fuck.

Yo-Yo!
Yo-Yo, throw me something!

Oh!
Nately!

Hang on!

Nately!

Nately, hold on!

Come on!
Give me your hand!

Come on, I'm stuck!
Yo-Yo, please!

- Come on!
- God damn it!

Yo-Yo, please!

Hey, get me a rope!

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