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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:32,783 --> 00:00:37,755 And on that point, members of the jury, I rest my case. 2 00:00:56,890 --> 00:00:59,814 (Camera clicks) 3 00:01:02,854 --> 00:01:04,606 (Alarm) 4 00:01:31,842 --> 00:01:33,936 Hello, Wanda. 5 00:02:45,957 --> 00:02:48,927 - Hi, Ken. - Hello, W-W-Wanda. 6 00:02:49,419 --> 00:02:53,265 Ken... this is Otto. 7 00:02:53,423 --> 00:02:55,596 Hello. Wanda's told me a lot about you. 8 00:02:55,759 --> 00:02:57,602 Hey! Great fish! 9 00:02:57,761 --> 00:03:00,435 A little squeeze of lemon, some tartare sauce, perfect! 10 00:03:02,057 --> 00:03:03,855 George back yet? 11 00:03:04,601 --> 00:03:07,229 No. He had to g-g-go to the b-b-b... 12 00:03:12,234 --> 00:03:13,827 What? 13 00:03:13,985 --> 00:03:17,205 That's quite a stutter you've got there, Ken. 14 00:03:17,364 --> 00:03:21,961 It's all right, it doesn't bother me. So George needs a weapons man, eh? 15 00:03:22,828 --> 00:03:24,546 A cup of tea, Ken? 16 00:03:24,705 --> 00:03:26,298 Y-y-y... 17 00:03:26,456 --> 00:03:28,458 Yeah. He'd like one. 18 00:03:28,625 --> 00:03:31,845 I had a good friend in the CIA had a stutter. Cost him his life. 19 00:03:32,003 --> 00:03:34,131 (Door opens) 20 00:03:35,298 --> 00:03:37,426 Hi, George. 21 00:03:38,927 --> 00:03:41,521 Hello, George. Get you a Scotch? 22 00:03:41,680 --> 00:03:43,353 Yeah. 23 00:03:43,515 --> 00:03:46,940 George... this is Otto. 24 00:03:49,104 --> 00:03:51,527 So, you're Wanda's brother. 25 00:03:51,690 --> 00:03:55,320 It's good to be here, George. England is a fine country. 26 00:03:55,902 --> 00:03:58,325 She tell you what we need? 27 00:04:02,492 --> 00:04:04,369 (Ken gasps) 28 00:04:07,372 --> 00:04:09,500 Something like that? 29 00:04:10,959 --> 00:04:12,927 Something like that. 30 00:04:14,838 --> 00:04:16,966 Hello, Wendy. 31 00:04:18,675 --> 00:04:20,803 Had a good day? 32 00:04:21,303 --> 00:04:24,056 I spend the morning trying to get a waste-disposal man, 33 00:04:24,222 --> 00:04:27,977 have lunch with Marjorie, who kept complaining about her husband, 34 00:04:28,143 --> 00:04:30,896 then I have to play three rubbers with Philippa. 35 00:04:31,021 --> 00:04:33,945 And now Sanderson's have sent the wrong flowers. 36 00:04:34,065 --> 00:04:35,692 Oh, no! 37 00:04:37,652 --> 00:04:40,872 - Would you like some tea? - Yes. 38 00:04:42,657 --> 00:04:43,749 I won the case. 39 00:04:43,909 --> 00:04:46,207 This is my first moment of peace all day. 40 00:04:51,041 --> 00:04:54,841 - Hello, Portia. How was the show? - Awful. I've got to have a new horse. 41 00:04:55,003 --> 00:04:57,973 - I thought you liked Phantom. - He's not fit for dog meat. 42 00:04:58,131 --> 00:05:01,726 - Can I change him? It won't cost much. - Oughtn't we to ask... 43 00:05:01,885 --> 00:05:04,889 I thought you were making tea, Archie. I'd better do it. 44 00:05:05,055 --> 00:05:08,059 - Let me do it. - No, I'll do it! 45 00:05:12,145 --> 00:05:15,274 - I won the case. - Oh! Now this is cracked. 46 00:05:17,651 --> 00:05:20,200 They're worth about 100,000 each. 47 00:05:20,362 --> 00:05:24,708 There are 135 of them. That makes 13 millions, my friends. 48 00:05:24,866 --> 00:05:27,710 - Dollars or pounds? - Pounds, pet. 49 00:05:27,869 --> 00:05:30,463 This is the big one. So... 50 00:05:31,706 --> 00:05:33,458 OK. 51 00:05:33,625 --> 00:05:35,377 Yeah. 52 00:05:36,211 --> 00:05:38,054 Otto? 53 00:05:38,213 --> 00:05:40,307 - Yes? - OK? 54 00:05:41,216 --> 00:05:43,310 - What? - The plan. 55 00:05:44,177 --> 00:05:46,271 Yeah. Great. No problem. 56 00:05:46,429 --> 00:05:48,932 What was the middle thing, about the police? 57 00:05:50,517 --> 00:05:52,895 We don't meet up at Heathrow until Tuesday... 58 00:05:53,061 --> 00:05:56,190 - Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. - I haven't finished yet. 59 00:05:56,314 --> 00:06:00,285 Because the police will watch all the airports for 72 hours. 60 00:06:00,443 --> 00:06:02,366 I know. I know. 61 00:06:03,572 --> 00:06:07,952 Do you want m-m-me to g-g-get a b-b-big 62 00:06:08,118 --> 00:06:11,622 c-c-car? 63 00:06:11,788 --> 00:06:14,667 Yes, Ken. A limo, OK? 64 00:06:14,833 --> 00:06:17,461 And put diplomatic plates on it, right? 65 00:06:17,627 --> 00:06:19,595 What if he has to speak in the break-in? 66 00:06:19,754 --> 00:06:22,007 Nobody says anything during a break-in. 67 00:06:22,173 --> 00:06:24,801 It's OK, Otto. Ken's good. 68 00:06:25,468 --> 00:06:29,439 So next week we won't have to look for work. 69 00:06:30,140 --> 00:06:32,939 And it won't have to look for us. 70 00:06:33,101 --> 00:06:35,195 Oscar Wilde. 71 00:06:40,108 --> 00:06:43,863 You really like animals, don't you, Ken? What's the attraction? 72 00:06:44,029 --> 00:06:49,502 Because you can t-t-trust them, and they don't sh-sh-sh... 73 00:06:49,659 --> 00:06:53,163 - Shit on you? - Show off all the time. 74 00:06:53,330 --> 00:06:58,427 Know what Nietzsche said about them? He said they were God's second blunder. 75 00:06:58,585 --> 00:07:00,087 Bye, sis. 76 00:07:00,253 --> 00:07:04,599 Well, you t-tell him from me that I-I-I... 77 00:07:04,716 --> 00:07:06,343 Bye, George. 78 00:07:07,385 --> 00:07:09,137 If you talk to Mom, tell her I said hi. 79 00:07:09,304 --> 00:07:11,306 - OK. - (Whispers) Don't let him touch you. 80 00:07:11,473 --> 00:07:13,225 One more day, we're together. 81 00:07:16,937 --> 00:07:20,612 I'm sorry about my brother, Ken. I know he's insensitive. 82 00:07:21,566 --> 00:07:25,241 He's had a hard life. Dad used to beat him up. 83 00:07:29,366 --> 00:07:30,492 Good. 84 00:07:31,326 --> 00:07:33,920 - (Man yells) - (Screaming) 85 00:08:55,869 --> 00:08:59,043 (George) Anybody moves and you're dead! 86 00:09:19,392 --> 00:09:21,486 (Alarm) 87 00:09:25,899 --> 00:09:27,776 (Dogs yap) 88 00:09:29,569 --> 00:09:32,823 Look where you're going! Chauvinist pig! 89 00:09:33,490 --> 00:09:37,040 Really! People here just think they own the pavement! 90 00:09:38,953 --> 00:09:40,796 (Engine starts) 91 00:09:44,667 --> 00:09:46,635 (Brakes screech) 92 00:10:04,687 --> 00:10:08,237 That was fun. I love robbing the English. They're so polite. 93 00:10:08,399 --> 00:10:10,367 - The d-d-d... - What is it, Ken? 94 00:10:10,527 --> 00:10:13,121 - The dog! - We didn't hit the dog, Ken. It's OK. 95 00:10:13,279 --> 00:10:15,122 $20 million, he worried about an insect. 96 00:10:15,281 --> 00:10:16,703 It's not an-an-an... 97 00:10:16,866 --> 00:10:18,368 Stutter's not getting any better, is it? 98 00:10:18,535 --> 00:10:19,787 Shut up! 99 00:10:19,953 --> 00:10:22,047 - Shut up! - (Siren) 100 00:10:28,044 --> 00:10:29,921 Ken? 101 00:10:30,964 --> 00:10:32,887 Bye. 102 00:11:03,872 --> 00:11:05,966 - Let's split. - Heathrow, Tuesday. 103 00:11:06,207 --> 00:11:09,336 - Lie low. No celebrating. - No celebrating? 104 00:11:10,503 --> 00:11:13,006 - See you in a couple of hours. - OK. Bye. 105 00:12:01,888 --> 00:12:03,765 - To 20 million. - To a job well done. 106 00:12:03,932 --> 00:12:05,058 To us. 107 00:12:05,225 --> 00:12:08,069 To the best brother-and-sister team since... 108 00:12:08,228 --> 00:12:10,230 Romeo and Juliet? 109 00:12:10,396 --> 00:12:14,492 Do you believe those cockney klutzes bought our story? What morons! 110 00:12:14,651 --> 00:12:16,699 - I want you to know something. - What? 111 00:12:16,861 --> 00:12:20,491 Even if you were my brother, I'd still want to fuck you. 112 00:12:20,990 --> 00:12:22,617 Oooh! 113 00:12:23,743 --> 00:12:25,916 - Make the call. - Momento, carissima. 114 00:12:26,079 --> 00:12:27,877 No. No Italian! 115 00:12:28,039 --> 00:12:29,040 Hey! 116 00:12:29,207 --> 00:12:35,180 Per cominciare, due insalate verdi con peperoni e un linguini primavera. 117 00:12:35,338 --> 00:12:38,057 No. Make the call, Otto. 118 00:12:39,759 --> 00:12:42,558 - Are you really Italian? - Absolutamente. Si. 119 00:12:42,679 --> 00:12:46,354 My name is Otto. It means eight. Say "Arrivederci a Giorgio." 120 00:12:46,474 --> 00:12:49,569 - Bye, George. - (Italian accent) Police, please. 121 00:12:49,686 --> 00:12:51,654 - Otto! - Argh! 122 00:12:53,064 --> 00:12:56,739 (English accent) Hello. I thought it might interest you to know 123 00:12:56,901 --> 00:13:00,246 that the Hatton Garden robbery today was pulled off 124 00:13:00,405 --> 00:13:04,000 by a Mr. George Thomason, who lives at 125 00:13:04,117 --> 00:13:06,836 Flat 3, Kipling Mansions, 126 00:13:06,995 --> 00:13:10,590 Murray Road, London, West 9. 127 00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:12,667 Wanda? 128 00:13:23,428 --> 00:13:25,522 (Siren) 129 00:13:35,690 --> 00:13:37,784 Police! Open up! 130 00:13:39,694 --> 00:13:41,913 Come on, open up! 131 00:13:45,033 --> 00:13:47,411 Open the door, or we'll knock it down. 132 00:13:57,754 --> 00:13:59,677 George Francis Thomason? 133 00:14:12,143 --> 00:14:14,987 Passport, tickets... 134 00:14:15,146 --> 00:14:17,069 ...money. 135 00:14:20,693 --> 00:14:23,663 - (Horn) - (Otto) Asshole! 136 00:14:23,821 --> 00:14:25,494 (Crash) 137 00:14:33,831 --> 00:14:36,334 - We're rich, Wanda. - Yep? 138 00:14:37,960 --> 00:14:39,337 I bet these last two weeks with me 139 00:14:39,504 --> 00:14:42,223 have been the most exciting two weeks of your life. 140 00:14:42,382 --> 00:14:44,350 You said it. 141 00:14:53,309 --> 00:14:55,778 (Breathes deeply) 142 00:14:55,937 --> 00:14:57,439 OK. 143 00:14:57,855 --> 00:14:59,653 OK. 144 00:14:59,816 --> 00:15:01,489 Disappointed! 145 00:15:02,443 --> 00:15:04,286 Son of a bitch! 146 00:15:04,445 --> 00:15:07,494 What do you have to do in this life to make people trust you? 147 00:15:07,657 --> 00:15:09,125 Shut up. 148 00:15:09,992 --> 00:15:11,665 People always take advantage of me. 149 00:15:11,828 --> 00:15:13,830 Shut up and think. Where's he moved it? 150 00:15:17,166 --> 00:15:20,386 - What are you doing? - I'm thinking! 151 00:15:20,503 --> 00:15:22,255 Thinking what I'll do to him. 152 00:15:22,422 --> 00:15:24,345 First, I'll hang him up with piano wire... 153 00:15:24,507 --> 00:15:27,135 - Where are you going? - To talk to him. 154 00:15:27,301 --> 00:15:29,019 Then... 155 00:15:29,178 --> 00:15:31,180 Talk to who? Talk to who?! 156 00:15:32,014 --> 00:15:34,563 So while installing windows for your parents, 157 00:15:34,684 --> 00:15:38,359 you were kneeling on the floor where there was broken glass? 158 00:15:38,521 --> 00:15:41,650 - That's right, sir. - And your parents can confirm this? 159 00:15:41,816 --> 00:15:44,695 Yes. And his aunt, Georgina Thomason. 160 00:15:44,861 --> 00:15:46,738 - Good, Bartlett. - (Knock at door) 161 00:15:46,904 --> 00:15:48,702 Yes? 162 00:15:48,865 --> 00:15:50,492 Sorry to interrupt you, sir. 163 00:15:50,658 --> 00:15:53,377 - Thomason, lady to see you. - Anything else? 164 00:15:53,536 --> 00:15:56,039 No. You don't have to dash off, do you? 165 00:15:56,205 --> 00:15:58,378 No, absolutely not. George? 166 00:15:58,541 --> 00:16:01,385 Ken's got the fish food. He'll be in later. 167 00:16:01,544 --> 00:16:03,546 - Thanks. - De nada. 168 00:16:03,713 --> 00:16:06,387 - What do you think? - We may be all right on the glass. 169 00:16:06,549 --> 00:16:09,098 But what else are they gonna come up with? 170 00:16:13,306 --> 00:16:15,400 (Wolf whistle) 171 00:16:19,479 --> 00:16:23,859 Oh, George! Oh, my God, I can't believe this is happening! 172 00:16:24,025 --> 00:16:26,619 That's not allowed in here, miss. 173 00:16:27,361 --> 00:16:28,954 - Are you OK? - It's all right. 174 00:16:29,113 --> 00:16:31,491 I don't think I can handle this. 175 00:16:31,657 --> 00:16:33,751 I was so afraid to go to sleep last night, I... 176 00:16:33,910 --> 00:16:36,413 Leave it out. Leave it out, OK? 177 00:16:37,079 --> 00:16:40,003 Now listen, listen, listen, listen. Listen. 178 00:16:42,168 --> 00:16:44,136 You stayed at my place. 179 00:16:45,296 --> 00:16:48,926 We slept late. You made me breakfast. 180 00:16:53,763 --> 00:16:55,731 What? 181 00:16:55,890 --> 00:17:00,111 - What's he doing here? - He wanted to see you. 182 00:17:00,269 --> 00:17:03,113 Who did it, George? Kevin Delaney? 183 00:17:03,272 --> 00:17:06,116 Want me to rub him out? Anything. You name it. 184 00:17:07,318 --> 00:17:10,288 - I have friends making enquiries. - Good. 185 00:17:11,322 --> 00:17:13,916 The jewels are very safe. 186 00:17:14,075 --> 00:17:17,625 If I get sent down, it all gets handed back to cut my sentence. 187 00:17:17,787 --> 00:17:22,258 Now, to cut my sentence even more, I could tell them who done it with me, 188 00:17:22,416 --> 00:17:25,966 if I wasn't very happy about everything. 189 00:17:27,421 --> 00:17:29,469 What was the middle thing? 190 00:17:29,632 --> 00:17:31,680 Piss off. 191 00:17:35,304 --> 00:17:38,057 - You want me to spring you? - Now! 192 00:17:43,062 --> 00:17:44,985 George? 193 00:17:46,107 --> 00:17:49,077 - You don't think...? - Do you? 194 00:17:49,235 --> 00:17:51,158 No! 195 00:17:53,406 --> 00:17:55,329 No? 196 00:17:56,534 --> 00:17:59,003 - No. - OK. 197 00:17:59,161 --> 00:18:01,209 - George? - What? 198 00:18:02,290 --> 00:18:04,793 Are you sure the garage is very safe? 199 00:18:07,003 --> 00:18:08,471 Trust me. 200 00:18:09,297 --> 00:18:11,049 Thank you very much. 201 00:18:11,215 --> 00:18:13,718 Thanks a lot. Bye. Have a good day. 202 00:18:15,386 --> 00:18:18,185 - So? - Well, he's not sure it was you. 203 00:18:18,347 --> 00:18:19,519 What about you? 204 00:18:19,682 --> 00:18:22,606 He believes me. He can't figure out you. 205 00:18:22,768 --> 00:18:26,489 - Figure out what? - If you turned him in or not, stupid! 206 00:18:27,815 --> 00:18:31,035 Don't, uh, ever, ever, 207 00:18:31,193 --> 00:18:34,322 ever call me stupid. OK? 208 00:18:37,199 --> 00:18:38,872 What? 209 00:18:42,038 --> 00:18:44,382 That's George's lawyer. 210 00:18:44,540 --> 00:18:47,214 The other guy must be the barrister. 211 00:18:48,794 --> 00:18:50,888 - So? - Trust me. 212 00:18:54,050 --> 00:18:56,473 - Let me know if anything turns up. - Yes. 213 00:18:56,636 --> 00:18:58,730 Excuse me. 214 00:18:58,888 --> 00:19:01,107 Don't I recognize you? 215 00:19:01,265 --> 00:19:03,233 No. No, I don't think so. 216 00:19:03,392 --> 00:19:04,894 Oh. 217 00:19:05,061 --> 00:19:08,110 But you are a famous barrister, aren't you? 218 00:19:08,272 --> 00:19:10,775 Er... well, hardly. 219 00:19:11,651 --> 00:19:14,621 Well, could I have your autograph anyway? 220 00:19:16,405 --> 00:19:18,624 - Yes, yes. Certainly. - Thanks. 221 00:19:19,492 --> 00:19:22,917 I'm studying aspects of your legal system. I'm American. 222 00:19:23,079 --> 00:19:25,582 - Oh, really? - I've just started, though. 223 00:19:25,748 --> 00:19:26,749 It's fascinating. 224 00:19:26,916 --> 00:19:29,339 What, er, what brings you here? 225 00:19:29,502 --> 00:19:33,507 Oh, it's a little embarrassing. I... have a friend. 226 00:19:33,673 --> 00:19:36,768 Oh! Oh, I see. Well, there you are. 227 00:19:36,926 --> 00:19:40,146 I knew it! You're Archie Leash! 228 00:19:40,304 --> 00:19:42,272 - Leach. - Right! 229 00:19:42,431 --> 00:19:46,152 I saw you in court. Uh, two weeks ago. 230 00:19:46,268 --> 00:19:49,613 - The casino break-in? - You were great! 231 00:19:49,772 --> 00:19:54,528 Oh, I'm a big fan of yours. I love the way you... cross-examine. 232 00:19:56,487 --> 00:20:00,037 - Oh, I really admire your work. - Thank you. 233 00:20:02,785 --> 00:20:05,959 - I'd better not... - I don't suppose you...? No. Fine. 234 00:20:06,122 --> 00:20:07,499 Well... 235 00:20:08,082 --> 00:20:10,631 Thank you for this. I'll treasure it. 236 00:20:13,295 --> 00:20:15,218 Au revoir. 237 00:20:17,383 --> 00:20:19,431 You speak French, too. 238 00:20:20,970 --> 00:20:22,813 (Wanda sighs) 239 00:20:39,280 --> 00:20:40,998 What's going on? 240 00:20:41,157 --> 00:20:44,912 Whatever George decides to do, he's gonna tell Leach first. 241 00:20:45,077 --> 00:20:47,580 - Why? - Because he's his lawyer. 242 00:20:47,747 --> 00:20:51,843 - Yeah, yeah. I know that. - So I'm gonna get to know Mr. Leach. 243 00:20:52,001 --> 00:20:54,470 George will tell him where the diamonds are? 244 00:20:54,628 --> 00:20:57,051 That's what I'm gonna find out. 245 00:21:09,018 --> 00:21:11,237 You done well, my son. 246 00:21:11,395 --> 00:21:13,898 Now, where are we going to hide it? 247 00:21:17,777 --> 00:21:23,375 Very good! Don't tell Wanda anything. Otto might get something out of her. 248 00:21:23,532 --> 00:21:25,876 - Now... - George... 249 00:21:26,285 --> 00:21:28,754 You are gonna g-g-get off, aren't you? 250 00:21:28,913 --> 00:21:33,168 Sure, don't worry about it, Ken. We'll fix it. Now, anything on Otto? 251 00:21:34,251 --> 00:21:36,219 Not yet. 252 00:21:36,378 --> 00:21:38,096 You watch him. 253 00:21:41,217 --> 00:21:42,969 Ken? 254 00:21:44,053 --> 00:21:45,805 OK. 255 00:21:45,971 --> 00:21:48,565 Looks like the police have been all over it. 256 00:21:48,724 --> 00:21:52,228 Let me just change clothes, and then I'll help you look. 257 00:21:52,394 --> 00:21:56,615 (English accent) Hello, K-K-Ken's p-p-pets. 258 00:21:57,358 --> 00:21:58,985 Hey! 259 00:21:59,693 --> 00:22:02,913 Wake up! Wake up, limey fish! 260 00:22:05,491 --> 00:22:08,415 So, how are you gonna get friendly with this lawyer? 261 00:22:08,577 --> 00:22:11,080 I don't know. I'll improvise. 262 00:22:11,247 --> 00:22:12,749 Fucking insects! 263 00:22:12,915 --> 00:22:16,510 I thought Englishmen didn't like women, the way they talk. 264 00:22:16,669 --> 00:22:21,425 No. He's straight. He's kinda cute, too, in a pompous sort of way. 265 00:22:23,759 --> 00:22:27,309 - You got the hots for him? - I'm not into necrophilia. 266 00:22:27,471 --> 00:22:29,098 (Otto laughs) 267 00:22:29,265 --> 00:22:31,939 What is this, Hump a Limey Week suddenly? 268 00:22:32,101 --> 00:22:35,105 Otto doesn't approve. Otto might get jealous. 269 00:22:35,855 --> 00:22:40,235 È molto pericoloso, signorina. 270 00:22:40,401 --> 00:22:42,449 Molto pericolo... 271 00:22:49,285 --> 00:22:51,788 - Carissima. - Oh, speak it. Speak it! 272 00:22:52,538 --> 00:22:55,633 Un ossobuco milanese con piselli. 273 00:22:56,458 --> 00:23:01,589 Melanzane parmigiana con spinaci. 274 00:23:01,714 --> 00:23:04,809 - Dov'è la farmacia? - Yes, yes, yes! 275 00:23:04,967 --> 00:23:06,640 - No, no, no. - Si, si, Si. 276 00:23:06,802 --> 00:23:09,146 No, no, no. No, not here. 277 00:23:09,305 --> 00:23:11,399 - Otto, no. - Dov'è la Fontana di Trevi? 278 00:23:11,557 --> 00:23:14,060 - Not here, Otto! - Um... 279 00:23:14,226 --> 00:23:16,274 - Mozzarella. - No! Not here. 280 00:23:16,437 --> 00:23:18,781 - Parmigiana. Gorgonzola! - Otto, no! 281 00:23:18,939 --> 00:23:20,111 Eh! 282 00:23:24,778 --> 00:23:26,872 Wanda? 283 00:23:31,535 --> 00:23:34,163 Look what I've got, Wanda. 284 00:23:35,706 --> 00:23:37,629 Treasure! 285 00:24:22,461 --> 00:24:24,384 - (Screams) - Oh! 286 00:24:24,713 --> 00:24:27,466 Oh, Ken, it's you! I thought it was the police again. 287 00:24:27,633 --> 00:24:30,386 Isn't it horrible about George? Oh, Ken! 288 00:24:30,552 --> 00:24:33,726 I've such a headache. Could you pick me up some aspirin? 289 00:24:33,889 --> 00:24:35,266 (Clatter) 290 00:24:35,432 --> 00:24:38,481 - What's that? - My brother. He's using the bathroom. 291 00:24:38,644 --> 00:24:41,113 - Otto? - Mm. We just went and saw George. 292 00:24:41,271 --> 00:24:44,400 Oh, it was horrible, Ken. It was just horrible. 293 00:24:48,904 --> 00:24:52,283 - Wh... - Isn't it terrible about George? 294 00:24:52,449 --> 00:24:55,419 When I find the bastard who squealed...! 295 00:24:55,577 --> 00:24:57,750 I love that man! 296 00:24:57,913 --> 00:25:00,507 What are you d-d-doing here? 297 00:25:00,666 --> 00:25:02,760 What am I doing here? 298 00:25:02,918 --> 00:25:05,012 Wanda was upset. She needed family. 299 00:25:05,170 --> 00:25:09,721 Sh-sh-she just had a sh-sh-shower. 300 00:25:12,344 --> 00:25:15,564 - I've got to speak to you. - (Wanda wails) 301 00:25:15,723 --> 00:25:17,691 - Are you OK now, sis? - I'm fine. 302 00:25:17,850 --> 00:25:20,194 - Call me if you need me. - OK. Thanks. 303 00:25:22,479 --> 00:25:25,608 What's the matter? Can't you think about her feelings? 304 00:25:25,774 --> 00:25:29,199 - There's something f-f-funny going on. - Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. 305 00:25:29,611 --> 00:25:30,954 You don't even know why you're excited. 306 00:25:31,113 --> 00:25:34,083 - I saw... - Ken, Ken, Ken! 307 00:25:34,908 --> 00:25:37,161 I didn't wanna say anything with George here, 308 00:25:37,327 --> 00:25:40,126 but isn't it time you faced reality? 309 00:25:40,289 --> 00:25:43,668 Come on! You're a very attractive man, Ken. 310 00:25:43,834 --> 00:25:46,132 You're smart. You've got... 311 00:25:46,295 --> 00:25:50,675 ...wonderful bones, great eyes, and you dress really interestingly. 312 00:25:50,841 --> 00:25:53,970 - Wh-what... - We could have fun together, you and I. 313 00:25:54,136 --> 00:25:57,436 And I think we'd be really good for each other. What do you say? 314 00:25:59,475 --> 00:26:01,318 You must be j-j-j... 315 00:26:01,477 --> 00:26:03,946 - May I kiss you? - No, you fucking can't! 316 00:26:04,063 --> 00:26:06,782 - Just a peck! No tongue! Ken! - No! 317 00:26:13,489 --> 00:26:16,584 Ken! OK. You didn't realize I was gay. 318 00:26:16,700 --> 00:26:19,499 OK. No, look, I'm sorry. 319 00:26:19,661 --> 00:26:23,882 I've handled this badly. Look... the physical side can wait. 320 00:26:25,042 --> 00:26:26,715 You need time. 321 00:26:27,002 --> 00:26:29,755 But... will you think about it? 322 00:26:53,362 --> 00:26:55,330 Oh, my God. 323 00:26:56,865 --> 00:26:58,959 Oh, my God! 324 00:26:59,618 --> 00:27:02,417 Ken, somebody just called! 325 00:27:02,955 --> 00:27:07,085 They said that the police know that the loot is in a garage in Fulham. 326 00:27:07,209 --> 00:27:09,086 You and I have to go get it. 327 00:27:09,211 --> 00:27:11,384 You and I have to go move it before the police find it. 328 00:27:11,547 --> 00:27:13,424 - No, no, no. - What? 329 00:27:13,590 --> 00:27:14,887 - It's all right! - What? 330 00:27:15,050 --> 00:27:16,472 Ge-Ge-Ge... 331 00:27:16,635 --> 00:27:18,387 George. 332 00:27:18,554 --> 00:27:20,898 - M-m-m... - Moved. 333 00:27:22,266 --> 00:27:24,234 George moved the loot?! 334 00:27:24,393 --> 00:27:25,394 Yes. 335 00:27:25,561 --> 00:27:28,030 Where'd he move it, Ken?! Where did he move it?! 336 00:27:28,188 --> 00:27:29,906 C-c-c... 337 00:27:42,244 --> 00:27:43,962 I don't know where it is. There's a key. 338 00:27:44,121 --> 00:27:46,169 I don't know what it's for. It's in the... 339 00:27:48,250 --> 00:27:51,720 Don't tell me. It's better that you don't tell me. 340 00:27:53,046 --> 00:27:56,767 Oh, you know, if it wasn't for George... 341 00:28:02,097 --> 00:28:03,565 Otto... 342 00:28:04,600 --> 00:28:07,695 ...tried to k-k-kiss me. 343 00:28:09,897 --> 00:28:12,491 I thought he might. 344 00:28:14,693 --> 00:28:17,947 No. Nothing, no marks at all. 345 00:28:18,113 --> 00:28:20,286 - But it is a safety deposit box key? - Oh, yes. 346 00:28:20,449 --> 00:28:22,497 But there are millions of them. 347 00:28:22,659 --> 00:28:25,128 Hotels, banks, offices... Sorry. 348 00:28:25,871 --> 00:28:27,623 Thank you. 349 00:28:28,165 --> 00:28:29,667 (Whispers) Fuck! 350 00:28:46,141 --> 00:28:49,315 That's him. That's him, Inspector. 351 00:28:49,478 --> 00:28:52,152 He's the one who tried to murder my dogs. 352 00:28:54,316 --> 00:28:56,410 (Doorbell) 353 00:29:10,707 --> 00:29:12,675 Davidson? 354 00:29:12,834 --> 00:29:17,180 There's an American legal student wants to see me. What time is Sir John due? 355 00:29:17,339 --> 00:29:20,013 - Half-past twelve, sir. - Right. 356 00:29:29,559 --> 00:29:31,653 Come in. 357 00:29:32,813 --> 00:29:35,191 - Hi. - How very nice to see you. 358 00:29:35,357 --> 00:29:37,826 - Am I interrupting? - Absolutely not. 359 00:29:37,943 --> 00:29:40,241 - Really? - No, really. Delighted to see you. 360 00:29:40,404 --> 00:29:42,327 Hello. 361 00:29:45,325 --> 00:29:48,545 So... this is the place, huh? 362 00:29:48,704 --> 00:29:51,173 - This is it. - Very nice. 363 00:29:51,331 --> 00:29:55,757 I was over at the courts this morning. Boy, it's fascinating! So much to know. 364 00:29:55,919 --> 00:29:58,388 Everybody wears these. Do you wear one? 365 00:29:58,588 --> 00:30:00,386 Ridiculous! 366 00:30:03,552 --> 00:30:07,477 Well, um, I only have a few minutes before... Sorry. 367 00:30:07,639 --> 00:30:11,519 - But till then, I'm all yours. - I just have a couple of questions. 368 00:30:11,685 --> 00:30:13,779 - Uh-huh. - Um... 369 00:30:14,896 --> 00:30:18,742 I'm having a problem understanding preliminary criminal procedures. 370 00:30:18,900 --> 00:30:20,573 Good. 371 00:30:20,736 --> 00:30:22,909 What exactly is the committal? 372 00:30:23,030 --> 00:30:27,911 Ah, interesting. Well, basically, it's a preliminary investigation 373 00:30:28,076 --> 00:30:32,832 where the prosecution presents evidence that the accused has a case to answer. 374 00:30:32,956 --> 00:30:36,051 That's what the books say. Let's take, for example... 375 00:30:36,209 --> 00:30:38,758 - my friend George Thomason. - Right. 376 00:30:38,920 --> 00:30:40,718 Now, when he goes into his committal... 377 00:30:40,881 --> 00:30:42,758 Thomason? 378 00:30:42,924 --> 00:30:45,222 - Yes. - George Thomason? 379 00:30:46,386 --> 00:30:47,979 Yes. Do you know him? 380 00:30:50,057 --> 00:30:53,061 - I'm defending him. - What are you talking about? 381 00:30:53,226 --> 00:30:55,479 I'm his barrister. His lawyer. 382 00:30:57,147 --> 00:30:59,241 That's so great! 383 00:31:00,192 --> 00:31:02,911 That's so weird, though. Isn't that weird? 384 00:31:03,070 --> 00:31:05,573 I'm so happy it's you that's defending him. 385 00:31:05,739 --> 00:31:08,743 - Thank you. - He's sure to get off now. 386 00:31:10,077 --> 00:31:13,251 Wow! Well, I can watch you work now. 387 00:31:13,413 --> 00:31:15,336 Please. 388 00:31:17,626 --> 00:31:23,633 Amazing. Well, anyway, at the committal George would then plead...? 389 00:31:23,799 --> 00:31:26,052 - Not guilty. - Really? 390 00:31:26,176 --> 00:31:29,180 Oh, yes. The evidence is largely circumstantial. 391 00:31:29,304 --> 00:31:31,773 There was an identification, wasn't there? 392 00:31:31,890 --> 00:31:36,066 Ah, true. But a very elderly lady. I think they've got the wrong man. 393 00:31:37,813 --> 00:31:40,407 - You don't think he did it? - No. 394 00:31:41,942 --> 00:31:45,492 Let's say, for argument's sake, that you did think he did it. 395 00:31:45,612 --> 00:31:49,116 Sure. If further evidence against him came to light, for example. 396 00:31:49,282 --> 00:31:53,378 Right, right. You would then advise him to plead guilty, 397 00:31:53,537 --> 00:31:57,132 and turn over the jewels to get his sentence cut. 398 00:31:57,290 --> 00:32:00,419 And he would turn them over to who? To you? 399 00:32:02,337 --> 00:32:04,260 - Theoretically? - Oh, of course. 400 00:32:04,423 --> 00:32:06,517 Um... Well, er... 401 00:32:07,926 --> 00:32:11,100 I'm so sorry, I've forgotten your name. 402 00:32:13,223 --> 00:32:16,193 - Wanda. - Wanda! What a fool, what a fool. 403 00:32:16,351 --> 00:32:18,820 Well, Wanda, there are really three... 404 00:32:23,316 --> 00:32:25,865 Not Wanda Gershwitz? 405 00:32:26,027 --> 00:32:28,906 - Yes. - Oh, my God. 406 00:32:29,531 --> 00:32:32,250 - What? - You're his alibi. 407 00:32:32,409 --> 00:32:34,628 - I can't talk to you. - Why not? 408 00:32:34,786 --> 00:32:39,758 My dear lady, you are a defense witness. I must ask you to leave immediately. 409 00:32:39,916 --> 00:32:41,259 What did I say? 410 00:32:41,418 --> 00:32:44,092 It's not ethical for me to talk to a witness. 411 00:32:44,629 --> 00:32:47,929 - Everybody does it in America. - Not in England. It's forbidden. 412 00:32:48,091 --> 00:32:52,892 I must insist, otherwise I may have to give up the case. I'm sorry. Please? 413 00:32:57,642 --> 00:32:59,565 Oh, Archie. 414 00:33:01,438 --> 00:33:06,035 I didn't come here today to talk about boring criminal procedures. 415 00:33:07,736 --> 00:33:10,615 Come on, you know. 416 00:33:10,780 --> 00:33:13,283 You knew the minute I walked in here. 417 00:33:15,243 --> 00:33:16,995 I want you. 418 00:33:19,581 --> 00:33:21,379 What? 419 00:33:21,541 --> 00:33:23,259 (Intercom) 420 00:33:23,418 --> 00:33:25,011 - Hello? - Sir John is here. 421 00:33:25,170 --> 00:33:27,764 - Show him in. - I want you to make love with me. 422 00:33:27,923 --> 00:33:29,596 - Pardon? - Nothing. 423 00:33:29,758 --> 00:33:32,932 - Will you take me to bed, Archie? - No. Sorry. 424 00:33:35,931 --> 00:33:37,808 Bye, Uncle. 425 00:33:41,478 --> 00:33:43,105 Hi! 426 00:33:53,907 --> 00:33:57,582 (♪ Rossini's "Il barbiere di Siviglia" playing in background) 427 00:34:00,288 --> 00:34:04,464 He's pleading not guilty, so you're safe until the trial. 428 00:34:05,877 --> 00:34:08,300 Leach doesn't think he did it. 429 00:34:09,673 --> 00:34:14,429 Ken says there's a safe deposit box key, but only George knows where it is. 430 00:34:15,720 --> 00:34:17,814 Thank you, Wanda! 431 00:34:21,476 --> 00:34:24,525 - What have you found out? - Not a lot. 432 00:34:24,688 --> 00:34:27,658 - You realize he's in court tomorrow? - I know. I know that! 433 00:34:28,066 --> 00:34:30,945 - So nothing, huh? - Nix. 434 00:34:31,111 --> 00:34:33,113 Zip. 435 00:34:33,280 --> 00:34:34,281 Diddly. 436 00:34:34,447 --> 00:34:36,415 Bupkis. 437 00:34:38,326 --> 00:34:39,452 Niente. 438 00:34:44,374 --> 00:34:46,718 - Oh, it's too big! - No, it isn't, Portia. 439 00:34:46,876 --> 00:34:48,924 - It is. It's enormous! - No, it isn't. 440 00:34:49,087 --> 00:34:51,966 - Oh, please, Mother! - No. Absolutely not. 441 00:34:52,132 --> 00:34:54,305 I'm so miserable and you just don't care! 442 00:34:54,467 --> 00:34:56,515 Do shut up, Portia! 443 00:34:57,345 --> 00:35:00,940 All I get all day is people complaining to me. 444 00:35:01,099 --> 00:35:02,692 Oh, dear. 445 00:35:10,650 --> 00:35:12,527 Ecco l'uomo. 446 00:35:28,793 --> 00:35:32,673 Ooh, le due cupole grande della cattedrale di Milano. 447 00:36:17,759 --> 00:36:19,887 Benito Mussolini! 448 00:36:33,274 --> 00:36:35,322 Dov'è il Vaticano? 449 00:36:37,696 --> 00:36:40,165 Oh, ecco Roma. 450 00:36:49,833 --> 00:36:51,961 ♪ Volare 451 00:36:52,127 --> 00:36:53,754 ♪ Oh-oh 452 00:36:53,920 --> 00:36:56,844 ♪ E cantare, oh... 453 00:37:08,768 --> 00:37:12,523 Archie, I want you to speak to her about plastic surgery. 454 00:37:13,481 --> 00:37:15,734 - Hm? - Do listen. 455 00:37:15,900 --> 00:37:17,117 I want you to speak to Portia. 456 00:37:17,277 --> 00:37:19,826 Right. I'll have a word with her in the morning. 457 00:37:19,988 --> 00:37:22,116 Good night, Archie. 458 00:37:22,949 --> 00:37:24,826 Good night, Archie. 459 00:37:24,993 --> 00:37:27,121 Good night, Wanda. 460 00:37:27,412 --> 00:37:29,506 Good night, who? 461 00:37:30,457 --> 00:37:32,459 Oh, sorry, darling. Just a stupid case 462 00:37:32,625 --> 00:37:35,549 I've got tomorrow with some lousy old hag. 463 00:37:36,504 --> 00:37:39,007 Are you George Francis Thomason 464 00:37:39,174 --> 00:37:42,849 of Kipling Mansions, Murray Avenue, London, We? 465 00:37:45,263 --> 00:37:48,187 - Yes, sir. - The charge is one of armed robbery. 466 00:37:48,349 --> 00:37:51,478 Sit down, Mr. Thomason. Are we ready for a committal claim? 467 00:37:51,811 --> 00:37:55,031 Yes. It will be under Section 6.2, madam. 468 00:37:55,190 --> 00:37:56,442 That is correct, 6.2. 469 00:37:56,608 --> 00:38:00,408 Here are the statements. All to be fully bound, please. 470 00:38:01,988 --> 00:38:04,082 Stand up then, Mr. Thomason. 471 00:38:04,240 --> 00:38:08,620 You are committed to stand trial at the Central Criminal Court. 472 00:38:08,745 --> 00:38:11,043 There is some urgency about this case, madam, 473 00:38:11,206 --> 00:38:14,551 as the main witness, Mrs. Eileen Coady, is elderly 474 00:38:14,709 --> 00:38:18,213 and has had serious heart difficulties recently. 475 00:38:18,379 --> 00:38:23,226 Is there any possibility that this case might be put down for an early trial? 476 00:38:23,551 --> 00:38:26,930 (Clerk) That will be for the listing office at the Old Bailey. 477 00:38:27,096 --> 00:38:30,225 - Take him down to the cell, officer. - Yes, sir. 478 00:38:48,910 --> 00:38:52,915 Hi, hon. How you doin'? Ooh, you look great. I love your hair. 479 00:38:53,081 --> 00:38:55,004 - Time for a coffee? - No. I've g-g-g... 480 00:38:55,166 --> 00:38:58,010 Have you thought about it? Why did he give you this? 481 00:38:58,169 --> 00:39:01,093 "Eileen Coady. 69 Basil Street." 482 00:39:01,256 --> 00:39:04,556 What does he want you to do? Send her flowers? Do her shopping? 483 00:39:04,717 --> 00:39:07,812 Show her a good time? Rub her out? T... 484 00:39:10,932 --> 00:39:12,855 He wants you to rub her out? 485 00:39:13,017 --> 00:39:14,815 Er... 486 00:39:14,936 --> 00:39:17,155 He's going to kill her! 487 00:39:19,816 --> 00:39:22,114 Fuck off, or I'll kill you. 488 00:39:22,277 --> 00:39:24,325 Limey fruits! 489 00:39:26,030 --> 00:39:29,785 So the old lady's gonna m-m-meet with an accident, eh, K-K-Ken? 490 00:39:30,034 --> 00:39:32,128 - Shh! - (Otto laughs) 491 00:39:33,288 --> 00:39:34,289 What's so funny? 492 00:39:34,455 --> 00:39:37,800 It's just that wasting old ladies isn't nice! 493 00:39:38,126 --> 00:39:41,300 Well, it's better than b-b-buggering people. 494 00:39:42,046 --> 00:39:44,674 I bet you a pound you don't kill her. 495 00:39:46,092 --> 00:39:48,186 - All right. - All right. 496 00:39:49,304 --> 00:39:53,525 I love watching your ass when you walk. Is that beautiful or what?! 497 00:39:55,101 --> 00:39:58,230 Don't go near him! He's mine! 498 00:39:58,938 --> 00:40:01,191 A pound says you won't kill her! 499 00:40:01,357 --> 00:40:03,451 (Otto laughs) 500 00:40:04,485 --> 00:40:08,035 - So when could you look at it? - Let's think. Thursday's hopeless. 501 00:40:08,197 --> 00:40:10,291 My wife's going to the opera Friday. 502 00:40:10,450 --> 00:40:12,794 I could look at it then, call you on Saturday. 503 00:40:12,952 --> 00:40:15,375 - I'd appreciate that. Thanks. - Bye, Frank. 504 00:40:15,538 --> 00:40:17,381 Hi. 505 00:40:17,540 --> 00:40:20,669 I know we're not allowed to talk. Gimme a call. 506 00:40:20,835 --> 00:40:23,088 I can't! 507 00:40:23,254 --> 00:40:26,349 - Please? - We're not allowed to speak. 508 00:40:26,507 --> 00:40:28,976 We don't have to. 509 00:40:29,135 --> 00:40:31,809 I don't want you for your conversation. 510 00:40:36,059 --> 00:40:38,061 I'd love to, but... 511 00:40:41,564 --> 00:40:43,817 (Wanda wails) 512 00:40:49,989 --> 00:40:52,242 - What happened? - Got a date Friday. 513 00:40:53,409 --> 00:40:55,878 (Ken whistles) 514 00:41:07,006 --> 00:41:08,724 (Dogs yap) 515 00:41:08,883 --> 00:41:12,888 Look here! Do you mind not making that terrible noise? 516 00:41:13,054 --> 00:41:15,853 My dogs will be having their nap. 517 00:41:16,015 --> 00:41:18,393 Nice doggy. Nice d-doggy. 518 00:41:18,559 --> 00:41:20,687 (Dog snarls and yaps) 519 00:41:37,453 --> 00:41:39,956 Otto, what are you doing? 520 00:41:40,123 --> 00:41:43,753 It's a Buddhist meditation technique. Focuses your aggression. 521 00:41:43,918 --> 00:41:48,469 - The monks used to do it before battle. - What kind of Buddhism is this, Otto? 522 00:41:50,258 --> 00:41:51,885 (Horn) 523 00:41:52,635 --> 00:41:54,763 - (Crash) - Asshole! 524 00:41:55,763 --> 00:41:59,438 It's an early Tantric meditation. What is this? 525 00:41:59,600 --> 00:42:03,446 In order to get information, I just might have to get friendly with him. 526 00:42:04,355 --> 00:42:06,528 Well, we're ready now, at last. 527 00:42:06,691 --> 00:42:08,534 Oh, good. Well, enjoy the opera, darling. 528 00:42:08,693 --> 00:42:11,242 - Your supper's in the fridge. - Marvelous. 529 00:42:11,404 --> 00:42:13,623 Be good. 530 00:42:14,198 --> 00:42:17,202 When you say "friendly," what are we talking about here? 531 00:42:17,368 --> 00:42:20,372 Cordial? Courteous? Supportive? What? 532 00:42:20,538 --> 00:42:23,633 I don't know. Let's just see what happens. 533 00:42:25,293 --> 00:42:29,639 So, "friendly" might include actual, uh, what? Penetration? 534 00:42:29,797 --> 00:42:32,095 - I don't need your jealousy now. - Jealousy? 535 00:42:32,258 --> 00:42:34,977 - Yes. - Hey, I'm merely curious. 536 00:42:35,136 --> 00:42:37,764 Me, jealous of that fop? 537 00:42:45,646 --> 00:42:48,991 - What about my tits? - Does he get to handle them? 538 00:42:49,150 --> 00:42:52,324 Yes. That's my forecast. I'll stand by that. 539 00:42:52,487 --> 00:42:55,491 - Nuzzling? - I think $20 million is worth nuzzling. 540 00:42:55,656 --> 00:42:57,954 Eighty percent chance there. 541 00:42:58,117 --> 00:42:59,710 - Sucking? - I thought you weren't jealous. 542 00:42:59,869 --> 00:43:03,294 I'm not! I don't believe in jealousy. It's for the weak. 543 00:43:03,456 --> 00:43:07,427 One thing, though. Touch his dick and he's dead! 544 00:43:13,257 --> 00:43:15,510 I told your father to get the car serviced. 545 00:43:15,676 --> 00:43:18,429 - Aren't we going, then? - Oh, do shut up, Portia. 546 00:43:31,359 --> 00:43:33,407 (Whispers) Hurry up. 547 00:43:49,043 --> 00:43:50,465 Hi. 548 00:43:52,380 --> 00:43:54,223 Do you despise me? 549 00:43:59,053 --> 00:44:01,431 No. That's not a word that leaps to mind. 550 00:44:02,682 --> 00:44:04,776 Can I stay, then? 551 00:44:09,605 --> 00:44:12,529 Of course. Look... Wanda... 552 00:44:12,692 --> 00:44:16,447 - I know. Your wife's coming back. - No, no. It's not her. 553 00:44:16,612 --> 00:44:18,910 She'll be gone for hours. It's about what I said to you. 554 00:44:19,615 --> 00:44:22,494 - It is all right for us to speak. - It is? 555 00:44:22,660 --> 00:44:25,459 Provided that we don't discuss the case. 556 00:44:26,539 --> 00:44:29,418 Oh. Oh, fine. 557 00:44:29,584 --> 00:44:32,087 It's just that if anyone saw us talking... 558 00:44:32,253 --> 00:44:33,755 Oh, but they won't. 559 00:44:41,262 --> 00:44:44,232 Sorry if I seem... pompous. 560 00:44:44,390 --> 00:44:46,813 Oh, you're the best, Archie. 561 00:44:51,606 --> 00:44:52,778 No. 562 00:44:52,940 --> 00:44:55,614 Not yet. I'm thirsty. 563 00:44:59,280 --> 00:45:00,327 What shall I get you? 564 00:45:02,116 --> 00:45:04,619 Whisky. 565 00:45:08,164 --> 00:45:13,295 You are the sexiest, most beautiful girl I have ever seen... 566 00:45:14,462 --> 00:45:16,931 ...in my entire life. 567 00:45:19,634 --> 00:45:21,728 Get me my drink. 568 00:45:31,312 --> 00:45:33,406 (Wanda giggles) 569 00:45:41,697 --> 00:45:43,324 Oh! 570 00:45:43,491 --> 00:45:45,619 Oh, Archie. 571 00:45:47,245 --> 00:45:49,339 Oh, Archie. 572 00:45:54,335 --> 00:45:55,962 So... 573 00:45:56,629 --> 00:45:59,849 if George decides to change his plea, 574 00:46:00,007 --> 00:46:03,102 he'd tell you where the loot is first, wouldn't he? 575 00:46:03,261 --> 00:46:05,104 Mm? 576 00:46:05,263 --> 00:46:07,732 Darling, we mustn't talk about the trial. 577 00:46:07,890 --> 00:46:10,734 I know. I just meant theoretically. 578 00:46:11,852 --> 00:46:13,980 Kiss me there. 579 00:46:14,855 --> 00:46:17,734 Oh, theoretically? Um... 580 00:46:18,359 --> 00:46:23,160 (Mumbled) Well, if the defendant wants to change his plea 581 00:46:23,322 --> 00:46:26,576 and his instructions to his legal representative... 582 00:46:27,952 --> 00:46:30,455 ...the normal procedure... 583 00:46:35,751 --> 00:46:38,721 - What's the matter? - Oh, it's wonderful, Archie. 584 00:46:42,883 --> 00:46:44,885 - Ah! - What? What? 585 00:46:45,052 --> 00:46:48,101 You're getting me so hot! I need something to drink. 586 00:46:48,264 --> 00:46:51,518 - Yeah. - Something cold? Maybe in the fridge? 587 00:46:51,684 --> 00:46:54,358 - Champagne? - Oh, my favorite! 588 00:46:55,771 --> 00:46:57,865 Don't go away. 589 00:47:00,818 --> 00:47:03,071 Je reviens. 590 00:47:12,455 --> 00:47:14,583 - What are you doing here? - Relax. 591 00:47:14,749 --> 00:47:17,468 - Get the fuck out! - I heard moaning. I was worried. 592 00:47:17,626 --> 00:47:19,469 I was faking it, you stupid jerk! 593 00:47:19,628 --> 00:47:21,847 Don't call me stupid. And I'm not jealous. 594 00:47:22,006 --> 00:47:24,100 - Then leave! - OK! 595 00:47:25,926 --> 00:47:28,020 Nice place. 596 00:47:28,721 --> 00:47:31,144 Don't touch his dick. 597 00:47:32,933 --> 00:47:35,027 His wife, his wife! 598 00:47:37,021 --> 00:47:39,524 Now for goodness sake, get off to bed. 599 00:47:44,403 --> 00:47:46,826 God! There isn't any ice. 600 00:47:56,082 --> 00:47:57,755 Champagne. 601 00:47:58,125 --> 00:48:00,674 - (Yells) - What's the matter? 602 00:48:02,463 --> 00:48:04,682 What are you doing? 603 00:48:06,217 --> 00:48:10,393 Champagne, dear. To welcome you home. Um, let me pour you a glass. 604 00:48:12,264 --> 00:48:14,141 Whose is the car? 605 00:48:14,308 --> 00:48:16,606 - Car? - Blocking the drive. 606 00:48:17,061 --> 00:48:19,814 There you are, dear. Cheers. Nice to see you again. 607 00:48:19,980 --> 00:48:23,530 - How was the opera? Finished early? - Whose car is it? 608 00:48:24,151 --> 00:48:26,950 Mine. It's a beauty, isn't it? 609 00:48:27,113 --> 00:48:29,536 Where'd I leave my drink, Archie? Ah! 610 00:48:31,742 --> 00:48:34,746 - Who is this? - Don't you know? 611 00:48:34,912 --> 00:48:38,883 How do you do, Mrs. Leach? I'm Harvey Manfren... jensen. 612 00:48:39,041 --> 00:48:41,885 - I'm, uh, with the CIA. - The CIA? 613 00:48:42,044 --> 00:48:43,967 That's correct, ma'am. 614 00:48:44,130 --> 00:48:46,383 I was, uh, just telling your husband here, 615 00:48:46,549 --> 00:48:50,474 before I, uh, had to go to your beautiful bathroom, 616 00:48:50,594 --> 00:48:55,020 we've got a high-ranking KGB defector in a safe house near here. 617 00:48:55,141 --> 00:48:58,361 We're debriefing him as of now and just... 618 00:48:59,186 --> 00:49:00,904 ...checking houses in the neighborhood. 619 00:49:01,063 --> 00:49:03,031 - For what? - For KGB. 620 00:49:03,190 --> 00:49:07,240 - Is there any danger? - No, no, no, no. No, uh... 621 00:49:07,403 --> 00:49:10,031 No. No, not now. We, uh... 622 00:49:10,448 --> 00:49:12,826 We just wanna keep everyone informed. 623 00:49:12,992 --> 00:49:16,587 So, Archie, thanks for the drink. Sorry to have troubled you. 624 00:49:16,745 --> 00:49:19,168 Keep everyone informed? 625 00:49:19,331 --> 00:49:22,551 - So there's no panic, ma'am. - But isn't it a secret? 626 00:49:22,710 --> 00:49:26,055 - You have no idea how secret. - Why are you telling everyone? 627 00:49:27,631 --> 00:49:30,384 - It's a smoke screen? - What?! 628 00:49:30,676 --> 00:49:32,394 Double bluff. 629 00:49:32,553 --> 00:49:35,397 Look, you know nothing about intelligence work. 630 00:49:35,514 --> 00:49:38,108 It's an XK Red 27 technique. 631 00:49:38,225 --> 00:49:41,479 My father was in the secret service, Mr. Manfredjin St. John, 632 00:49:41,645 --> 00:49:44,694 and I know that you don't keep the public informed 633 00:49:44,857 --> 00:49:48,532 when you are debriefing KGB defectors in a safe house. 634 00:49:48,694 --> 00:49:49,911 You don't, huh? 635 00:49:50,070 --> 00:49:54,291 Not unless you're congenitally insane or irretrievably stupid, no. 636 00:49:55,826 --> 00:49:59,000 - Don't call me stupid. - Why on earth not? 637 00:50:00,080 --> 00:50:05,132 Oh, you English are so superior, aren't you? 638 00:50:05,294 --> 00:50:09,549 Would you like to know where you'd be without us, the US of A, to protect you? 639 00:50:09,715 --> 00:50:12,935 I'll tell you. The smallest fucking province 640 00:50:13,093 --> 00:50:15,141 in the Russian Empire, that's what! 641 00:50:15,262 --> 00:50:18,061 So don't call me stupid, lady. Just thank me! 642 00:50:18,224 --> 00:50:20,818 Thank you for popping in and protecting us! 643 00:50:20,976 --> 00:50:23,946 If it wasn't for us, you'd all be speaking German! Singing: 644 00:50:24,104 --> 00:50:27,904 ♪ Deutschland, Deutschland über alles 645 00:50:28,067 --> 00:50:31,287 That's my brother. Get rid of your wife and get my necklace. 646 00:50:31,445 --> 00:50:33,698 Necklace. Right. I'll think of something. 647 00:50:33,864 --> 00:50:36,333 - Who are you talking to? - Myself. 648 00:50:36,492 --> 00:50:40,122 - Well, who was that shouting? - The brother of a f-friend of mine. 649 00:50:40,287 --> 00:50:42,210 Archie, who on earth? 650 00:50:42,373 --> 00:50:44,296 I don't know. He rang the bell and I... 651 00:50:44,458 --> 00:50:46,677 - I need a drink. - Let's go to the pub. 652 00:50:46,835 --> 00:50:48,758 - What? - Let's go to the pub. 653 00:50:48,879 --> 00:50:51,723 - Would you like to? - We haven't been for 15 years! 654 00:50:51,882 --> 00:50:53,555 Be rather nice for Portia to see it now. 655 00:50:53,717 --> 00:50:55,685 - Honestly! - (Archie screams) 656 00:50:55,844 --> 00:50:59,348 - What on earth is the matter? - I thought the picture was falling. 657 00:50:59,515 --> 00:51:02,189 - Will you pull yourself together? - It's secure now. 658 00:51:02,643 --> 00:51:06,489 - What's this? - Thanks, Portia. OK. Coming with us? 659 00:51:06,647 --> 00:51:08,820 - What was that? - A necklace. 660 00:51:08,941 --> 00:51:11,364 - What's going on? - Nothing. Right, let's go. 661 00:51:11,527 --> 00:51:13,404 - Can I see that? - What? 662 00:51:13,571 --> 00:51:15,323 In your hand. 663 00:51:15,489 --> 00:51:17,207 Your other hand. 664 00:51:17,366 --> 00:51:18,993 (Tuts) 665 00:51:19,159 --> 00:51:22,709 Portia, go to your room. I can explain. I left some papers... 666 00:51:22,871 --> 00:51:25,590 - Now! They sent a new girl. - Oh, Archie. 667 00:51:25,749 --> 00:51:30,175 - No, really. She's Canadian. - It's lovely. Thank you. 668 00:51:33,924 --> 00:51:36,177 Oh, it's even got a W for Wendy. 669 00:51:36,302 --> 00:51:39,897 Oh, I'm so glad you like it, darling. 670 00:51:40,055 --> 00:51:43,400 It's the most beautiful thing you've ever given me. 671 00:51:47,354 --> 00:51:50,153 Oh, Archie! This isn't like you. 672 00:51:58,782 --> 00:52:01,205 Are you fucking crazy?! 673 00:52:02,161 --> 00:52:05,506 - Hey, I saved your ass. - I had him right where I wanted him! 674 00:52:05,664 --> 00:52:08,588 - Hey... - I give you one thing to do, Otto! 675 00:52:08,751 --> 00:52:11,470 You're supposed to drive me and shut up! 676 00:52:12,546 --> 00:52:14,640 (Car drives away) 677 00:52:17,217 --> 00:52:19,345 (Phone rings) 678 00:52:22,056 --> 00:52:24,150 Hello? 679 00:52:24,308 --> 00:52:26,402 Hold on. It's for you. 680 00:52:29,063 --> 00:52:30,781 Hello? 681 00:52:32,650 --> 00:52:35,403 Er, not at the moment, no. 682 00:52:38,364 --> 00:52:42,540 Yes, well, I'm not quite sure when I'll be able to get hold of that. 683 00:52:43,160 --> 00:52:47,336 Yes, yes. I do appreciate that. Yes, as soon as possible. 684 00:52:49,166 --> 00:52:52,045 Well, that would be very nice, obviously. 685 00:52:52,211 --> 00:52:55,010 So, um, see you soon, I hope. 686 00:52:55,172 --> 00:52:56,515 Bye, Frank. 687 00:52:57,341 --> 00:52:58,843 (Dog snarling) 688 00:53:00,636 --> 00:53:03,640 Calm down. Calm down! Easy, g-g-girl. 689 00:53:03,806 --> 00:53:05,934 Easy. Easy. 690 00:53:09,978 --> 00:53:12,197 Come here. 691 00:53:12,439 --> 00:53:13,941 Come here. 692 00:53:14,066 --> 00:53:17,115 Smell. Smell. Smell, Maggie. Smell. 693 00:53:18,445 --> 00:53:20,698 Now, k-k-kill! 694 00:53:22,866 --> 00:53:24,038 Kill! 695 00:53:24,660 --> 00:53:26,628 - Kill! - (Dog growls) 696 00:53:26,787 --> 00:53:27,879 Kill! 697 00:53:46,348 --> 00:53:48,601 (Bell tolls) 698 00:53:51,353 --> 00:53:54,778 We therefore commit its body to the ground; 699 00:53:54,940 --> 00:53:58,194 earth to earth, ashes to ashes, 700 00:53:58,360 --> 00:54:00,328 dust to dust... 701 00:54:00,446 --> 00:54:08,446 ♪ Miserere domine 702 00:54:11,832 --> 00:54:15,712 ♪ Canis mortuus est 703 00:54:18,005 --> 00:54:20,929 Hello, honey. What happened? 704 00:54:21,842 --> 00:54:24,015 - N-n-nothing. - What's that? 705 00:54:24,178 --> 00:54:26,351 - Er... - Not Granny? 706 00:54:26,513 --> 00:54:29,016 Er, not yet, n-n-no. 707 00:54:29,183 --> 00:54:31,151 - Who's it for, then? - A f-f-f... 708 00:54:31,310 --> 00:54:34,314 A fish? Frenchman? A phone operator? 709 00:54:34,480 --> 00:54:37,859 - Friend. - Oh! A four-legged one? 710 00:54:38,025 --> 00:54:40,778 - Where's my sister? - She's in the b-b-b... 711 00:54:40,944 --> 00:54:43,493 - Thank you. - Lavatory. 712 00:54:43,614 --> 00:54:45,332 Wanda. 713 00:54:46,784 --> 00:54:49,708 - (Quietly) Anything? - What? No. 714 00:54:49,870 --> 00:54:53,374 - (Loudly) Why are you here? - I'm here because I'm bored! 715 00:54:53,540 --> 00:54:58,762 Bored, wandering around this God-awful city, shoving George's ugly pic... 716 00:54:59,213 --> 00:55:03,013 Talking to stuck-up, intellectually inferior British faggots. 717 00:55:03,133 --> 00:55:04,931 Jesus, they're uptight. 718 00:55:05,052 --> 00:55:08,727 They get rigor mortis in the prime of life in this country. 719 00:55:08,889 --> 00:55:12,063 Standing there with their hair clenched, just... 720 00:55:13,560 --> 00:55:15,608 ...counting the seconds till the weekend, 721 00:55:15,771 --> 00:55:17,990 so that they can dress up like ballerinas 722 00:55:18,106 --> 00:55:21,656 and whip themselves into a frenzy at the flat at four... 723 00:55:21,777 --> 00:55:23,575 2B, St... 724 00:55:24,404 --> 00:55:27,783 To be... honest, I, uh, hate them. 725 00:55:28,450 --> 00:55:32,080 I mean, pretending they're so fucking lawyer... 726 00:55:32,579 --> 00:55:36,709 Uh, superior. So fucking superior, with those phony accents. 727 00:55:37,501 --> 00:55:41,927 Not you, Ken. You've got a beautiful speaking voice. When it works. 728 00:55:42,089 --> 00:55:44,012 Son of a bitch! 729 00:55:49,346 --> 00:55:52,850 (Loudly) Wanna have some lunch? (Quietly) Have you heard from him? 730 00:55:53,016 --> 00:55:54,984 - Who? - Archie. 731 00:55:55,143 --> 00:55:57,942 (Loudly) No. I have to finish my hair. (Quietly) No. 732 00:55:58,105 --> 00:56:00,984 (Quietly) Nothing? (Loudly) OK. Well, I'm outta here! 733 00:56:01,149 --> 00:56:02,947 (Quietly) No plans to see him? 734 00:56:03,110 --> 00:56:05,408 (Quietly) No. (Loudly) OK, bye, bro. 735 00:56:05,571 --> 00:56:07,790 Bye, Wanda! 736 00:56:10,117 --> 00:56:12,165 Oh, sorry. 737 00:56:14,538 --> 00:56:17,667 - What?! - An old lady wanted it engraved, 738 00:56:17,833 --> 00:56:21,554 and she's dying, and somebody put it in the display cabinet... 739 00:56:21,712 --> 00:56:23,806 - That's their problem. - Not legally. 740 00:56:23,964 --> 00:56:26,262 - You paid for it! - They accept their mistake. 741 00:56:26,425 --> 00:56:29,395 That's why they're offering you this to replace it. 742 00:56:29,553 --> 00:56:32,227 This is the nicest thing you've ever given me, 743 00:56:32,389 --> 00:56:34,016 and you want me to replace it with something awful... 744 00:56:34,182 --> 00:56:36,105 - I don't want... - They can't have it. 745 00:56:36,268 --> 00:56:37,440 - Wendy. - No. 746 00:56:37,561 --> 00:56:41,486 - Wendy! - No! Tell them they can't have it! 747 00:56:41,648 --> 00:56:44,071 You're the bloody barrister! 748 00:57:17,851 --> 00:57:19,228 - Hello. - Hello. 749 00:57:21,188 --> 00:57:24,158 Oh, Archie, it's beautiful. 750 00:57:24,316 --> 00:57:26,569 It's just beautiful. 751 00:57:28,946 --> 00:57:30,948 Oh, my God! Look! 752 00:57:32,616 --> 00:57:34,710 Oh, Archie, it's beautiful. 753 00:57:34,868 --> 00:57:37,166 Isn't it wonderful? 754 00:57:37,329 --> 00:57:40,048 - Whose is it? - Belongs to someone at the chambers. 755 00:57:40,207 --> 00:57:41,709 And where are they? 756 00:57:42,918 --> 00:57:44,420 Hong Kong. 757 00:57:44,586 --> 00:57:46,133 Ah, so. 758 00:57:46,296 --> 00:57:48,298 Gone for weeks. 759 00:57:48,465 --> 00:57:50,559 Nice rug, Archie. 760 00:57:52,302 --> 00:57:54,396 May I? 761 00:57:55,347 --> 00:57:57,441 What?! Archie, what are you doing? 762 00:57:57,599 --> 00:57:59,693 The polka, I think. 763 00:58:03,480 --> 00:58:06,575 - You make me feel free! - Free? 764 00:58:07,359 --> 00:58:11,830 Wanda, do you have any idea what it's like being English? 765 00:58:12,072 --> 00:58:14,746 Being so correct all the time? Being so... 766 00:58:14,908 --> 00:58:19,209 stifled by this dread of doing the wrong thing? 767 00:58:19,579 --> 00:58:21,047 Of saying to someone "Are you married?" 768 00:58:21,206 --> 00:58:23,709 And hearing "My wife left me this morning?" 769 00:58:23,875 --> 00:58:26,173 Or saying... "Do you have children?" 770 00:58:26,336 --> 00:58:30,216 and being told they all burned to death on Wednesday? 771 00:58:30,340 --> 00:58:34,891 You see, Wanda, we're all... terrified of embarrassment. 772 00:58:35,053 --> 00:58:38,148 That's why we're so... dead. 773 00:58:39,683 --> 00:58:40,980 Most of my friends are dead. 774 00:58:41,101 --> 00:58:43,445 You know, we have these piles of corpses to dinner. 775 00:58:45,063 --> 00:58:47,157 But you're alive, God bless you. 776 00:58:47,315 --> 00:58:49,943 And I wanna be. I'm so fed up with all this! 777 00:58:52,112 --> 00:58:54,956 I wanna make love with you, Wanda. 778 00:58:55,115 --> 00:58:56,833 I'm a good lover. At least... 779 00:58:57,951 --> 00:59:00,420 ...used to be, back in the early 14th century. 780 00:59:01,747 --> 00:59:03,215 Can we go to bed? 781 00:59:09,546 --> 00:59:10,547 Yeah. 782 00:59:12,257 --> 00:59:14,385 Hang on! Mind your head. 783 00:59:22,309 --> 00:59:24,562 I think I love you, Wanda. 784 00:59:24,728 --> 00:59:28,778 Oh, Archie. Can I ask you a question? 785 00:59:28,940 --> 00:59:31,910 - Anything. - Where's my locket? 786 00:59:32,736 --> 00:59:34,613 - I couldn't get it. - What? 787 00:59:34,780 --> 00:59:38,330 Wendy wouldn't give it back. Look, I got you this instead. 788 00:59:39,326 --> 00:59:43,797 - Do you like it? - No, Archie. I have to have mine. 789 00:59:43,955 --> 00:59:46,583 What's the matter? Why? 790 00:59:47,667 --> 00:59:50,261 My mother gave it to me... 791 00:59:51,129 --> 00:59:54,724 ...on her death... bed. 792 00:59:56,051 --> 01:00:00,022 Oh, I'm sorry. All right, darling. I'll... I'll get it for you. 793 01:00:00,180 --> 01:00:03,024 - You promise? - I'll think of something. 794 01:00:03,183 --> 01:00:08,565 Sex is very, very difficult for me with somebody that I don't trust completely. 795 01:00:09,564 --> 01:00:12,033 I promise I'll get it. OK? 796 01:00:12,692 --> 01:00:15,491 Oh, I love you, Archie. 797 01:00:16,780 --> 01:00:20,501 I have loved you ever since the first second I saw you. 798 01:00:21,326 --> 01:00:22,748 (Thud) 799 01:00:23,495 --> 01:00:25,543 - What was that? - What? 800 01:00:27,124 --> 01:00:29,218 Your brother didn't bring you, did he? 801 01:00:29,376 --> 01:00:31,219 No. 802 01:00:31,378 --> 01:00:33,426 He's no idea? 803 01:00:33,588 --> 01:00:36,387 - He doesn't have a clue. - What? 804 01:00:37,717 --> 01:00:39,719 - He is so dumb. - Really? 805 01:00:39,845 --> 01:00:43,895 He thought that the Gettysburg Address was where Lincoln lived. 806 01:00:47,144 --> 01:00:51,445 Oh, those terrible lies he told about the CIA! 807 01:00:51,606 --> 01:00:53,108 So painful! 808 01:00:53,275 --> 01:00:55,824 And when he heard your daughter's called Portia, 809 01:00:55,986 --> 01:00:59,206 he said "Why did they name her after a car?" 810 01:00:59,364 --> 01:01:01,412 (Archie guffaws) 811 01:01:03,743 --> 01:01:06,371 I love the way you laugh. 812 01:01:06,538 --> 01:01:08,961 I love you. You're funny. 813 01:01:10,417 --> 01:01:15,674 How come a girl as... bright as you could have a brother who's so... 814 01:01:15,839 --> 01:01:18,763 - Don't call me stupid. - (Screaming) 815 01:01:18,925 --> 01:01:21,019 Jesus Christ! 816 01:01:22,095 --> 01:01:23,972 Argh! 817 01:01:24,431 --> 01:01:26,104 Come on! 818 01:01:27,017 --> 01:01:29,145 - Otto! Ouch! - Come on! 819 01:01:29,311 --> 01:01:31,405 - Otto! - Come on. 820 01:01:32,480 --> 01:01:34,949 I'll deal with you later! 821 01:01:35,734 --> 01:01:38,908 - What have you done with her? - She's all right. 822 01:01:39,070 --> 01:01:41,789 - (Wanda) Otto! - Now, apologize. 823 01:01:43,074 --> 01:01:44,576 What? 824 01:01:44,743 --> 01:01:46,290 Apologize. 825 01:01:47,329 --> 01:01:49,627 Are you totally deranged? 826 01:01:54,502 --> 01:01:56,800 You pompous, 827 01:01:56,963 --> 01:01:59,637 stuck-up, snot-nosed, 828 01:01:59,799 --> 01:02:02,302 English, giant-twerp, 829 01:02:02,469 --> 01:02:05,939 scumbag, fuck-face, dickhead asshole! 830 01:02:06,681 --> 01:02:10,777 How very interesting. You're a true vulgarian, aren't you? 831 01:02:10,894 --> 01:02:14,148 You're the vulgarian, you fuck! Now apologize! 832 01:02:15,482 --> 01:02:17,450 What? Me to you? 833 01:02:22,864 --> 01:02:24,707 Apologize. 834 01:02:24,824 --> 01:02:26,997 All right, all right. I apologize. 835 01:02:27,160 --> 01:02:29,629 - You're really sorry? - I'm really sorry. 836 01:02:29,788 --> 01:02:32,007 I apologize unreservedly. 837 01:02:32,707 --> 01:02:37,338 - You take it back? - I do. I offer a complete retraction. 838 01:02:37,504 --> 01:02:41,008 The imputation was totally without basis in fact, 839 01:02:41,174 --> 01:02:45,270 and was in no way fair comment, and was motivated purely by malice. 840 01:02:45,428 --> 01:02:50,184 I deeply regret any distress my comments may have caused you or your family. 841 01:02:50,725 --> 01:02:55,902 And I hereby undertake not to repeat any such slander at any time in the future. 842 01:02:58,692 --> 01:02:59,659 OK. 843 01:03:51,119 --> 01:03:52,416 (Screams) 844 01:03:59,336 --> 01:04:01,589 (Bell tolls) 845 01:04:01,755 --> 01:04:09,755 ♪ Miserere domine 846 01:04:12,891 --> 01:04:16,987 ♪ Canis mortuus est 847 01:04:17,771 --> 01:04:19,068 (Otto) You said you loved him! 848 01:04:19,230 --> 01:04:22,609 (Wanda) That's right! Here's a question for you. 849 01:04:22,776 --> 01:04:26,906 A: Wanda was lying. B: Wanda was telling the truth. 850 01:04:27,072 --> 01:04:29,416 Which one are you gonna pick? 851 01:04:29,574 --> 01:04:32,544 What was the first one? You said you weren't gonna see him! 852 01:04:32,702 --> 01:04:34,454 'Cause I knew you'd come along and fuck it up! 853 01:04:34,621 --> 01:04:37,215 I was dealing with something delicate. 854 01:04:37,374 --> 01:04:39,547 I'm setting up a guy who's important to us, 855 01:04:39,709 --> 01:04:42,963 who'll tell me where the loot is and if you'll be arrested, 856 01:04:43,129 --> 01:04:47,635 and you come loping in like Rambo and you dangle him out a fifth-floor window! 857 01:04:47,801 --> 01:04:49,803 Now, was that smart?! 858 01:04:49,969 --> 01:04:52,597 - OK. - Was it shrewd? Was it good tactics? 859 01:04:52,764 --> 01:04:54,812 Or was it stupid?! 860 01:04:56,309 --> 01:04:58,152 Don't call me stupid. 861 01:04:58,311 --> 01:05:02,691 Oh, right! To call you stupid would be an insult to stupid people! 862 01:05:02,857 --> 01:05:07,112 I've known sheep that could outwit you. I've worn dresses with higher IQs. 863 01:05:07,278 --> 01:05:11,283 But you think you're an intellectual, don't you, ape? 864 01:05:11,449 --> 01:05:14,498 - Apes don't read philosophy. - Yes, they do, Otto. 865 01:05:14,661 --> 01:05:16,834 They just don't understand it. 866 01:05:16,955 --> 01:05:20,050 Now let me correct you on a couple of things, OK? 867 01:05:20,208 --> 01:05:22,757 Aristotle was not Belgian. 868 01:05:23,169 --> 01:05:27,470 The central message of Buddhism is not every man for himself. 869 01:05:27,632 --> 01:05:29,851 The London Underground is not a political movement. 870 01:05:30,009 --> 01:05:33,388 Those are all mistakes. I looked 'em up. 871 01:05:34,139 --> 01:05:36,733 Now... you have just assaulted 872 01:05:36,891 --> 01:05:40,441 the one man who can keep you out of jail and make you rich. 873 01:05:40,603 --> 01:05:42,856 So what are you gonna do about it, huh? 874 01:05:43,022 --> 01:05:45,866 What would an intellectual do? 875 01:05:46,025 --> 01:05:48,403 What would Plato do? 876 01:05:52,198 --> 01:05:54,542 - (Mumbles) Apol... - Pardon me? 877 01:05:54,701 --> 01:05:56,829 - Apolo... - What? 878 01:05:57,704 --> 01:05:59,752 - Apologize! - Right! 879 01:06:01,458 --> 01:06:03,381 I'm sorry. 880 01:06:03,918 --> 01:06:07,798 No. Not to me, to Archie. 881 01:06:08,214 --> 01:06:10,842 And make it good, or we're dead. 882 01:06:16,931 --> 01:06:21,357 Oh, I'm so very, very, very, very s... 883 01:06:21,519 --> 01:06:23,613 Fuck you! 884 01:06:24,439 --> 01:06:26,157 I'm s... 885 01:06:26,316 --> 01:06:28,569 I'm very, very s... 886 01:06:28,735 --> 01:06:31,409 I'm so very s... 887 01:06:31,571 --> 01:06:34,245 Very, very, very s... 888 01:06:48,588 --> 01:06:50,386 Very, very... 889 01:06:50,548 --> 01:06:52,550 ssfff... 890 01:06:52,717 --> 01:06:54,765 (Glass breaks) 891 01:08:03,663 --> 01:08:04,664 (Thud) 892 01:08:04,831 --> 01:08:06,925 (Otto) Hello, Mr. Burglar! 893 01:08:07,083 --> 01:08:10,678 Going somewhere? Thought you could rob Mr. Leach, eh? 894 01:08:10,837 --> 01:08:14,762 I'm gonna teach you a lesson. He happens to be a good friend of mine. 895 01:08:14,924 --> 01:08:17,347 - Otto! - He's gonna be very pleased with me 896 01:08:17,510 --> 01:08:22,357 when he finds you all tied up and ready for the police. 897 01:08:24,350 --> 01:08:28,025 And don't call me Otto. To you, I am Mr... 898 01:08:35,862 --> 01:08:37,455 Agh! 899 01:08:38,698 --> 01:08:39,870 Oh, God. 900 01:08:42,869 --> 01:08:45,372 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. 901 01:08:45,538 --> 01:08:47,381 I'm sorry. 902 01:08:47,540 --> 01:08:49,634 Please. I'm sorry. 903 01:08:50,418 --> 01:08:52,420 I'm sorry. I didn't know it was you. 904 01:08:52,545 --> 01:08:54,263 How could I know it was you? 905 01:08:54,422 --> 01:08:57,471 I mean, how could you expect me to guess? 906 01:08:57,634 --> 01:09:02,765 Stupid jerk! I mean, what the fuck are you doing robbing your own house? 907 01:09:02,930 --> 01:09:07,151 You asshole! You stupid, stiff, pompous, English... 908 01:09:07,310 --> 01:09:09,062 Agh! 909 01:09:09,228 --> 01:09:11,401 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. 910 01:09:12,106 --> 01:09:14,575 Uh... Uh... 911 01:09:14,942 --> 01:09:16,319 Yeah. 912 01:09:50,645 --> 01:09:53,364 (Wendy screams) 913 01:09:57,944 --> 01:10:00,447 God Almighty! 914 01:10:00,613 --> 01:10:02,536 Bloody hell! 915 01:10:09,956 --> 01:10:11,958 Darling! 916 01:10:12,125 --> 01:10:14,844 - Are you hurt? Speak to me! - (Groans) 917 01:10:15,002 --> 01:10:17,505 - Are you hurt? - (Groans) 918 01:10:17,797 --> 01:10:19,970 Can't you speak? Archie! 919 01:10:20,133 --> 01:10:23,262 - Archie, what has happened? - (Coughs) 920 01:10:24,637 --> 01:10:27,140 Archie, we've been burgled. 921 01:10:27,306 --> 01:10:29,229 - Oh, no! - Well, are you hurt? 922 01:10:29,350 --> 01:10:31,648 No. I'm fine. Bit of a headache. 923 01:10:31,811 --> 01:10:36,408 I... I, er, I came in here, somebody hit me, tied me up... 924 01:10:36,566 --> 01:10:38,660 - God, is that the time? - What? 925 01:10:38,818 --> 01:10:41,241 Er, I didn't realize it was quite so late. 926 01:10:41,404 --> 01:10:43,577 - What?! - Er, I'm late for a conference. 927 01:10:43,698 --> 01:10:47,328 - A conference? You've been attacked! - It's nothing. I must fly. 928 01:10:47,493 --> 01:10:50,167 - Archie! - I'll help you tidy up when I get back. 929 01:10:50,329 --> 01:10:52,832 - Ah, hello, Portia. - What's happened? 930 01:10:53,708 --> 01:10:57,338 Your father has finally gone completely mental. 931 01:11:20,526 --> 01:11:22,403 Hi. 932 01:11:33,706 --> 01:11:35,583 Archie! 933 01:11:37,794 --> 01:11:40,172 - Thank you so much. - Champagne? 934 01:11:40,338 --> 01:11:42,215 OK. 935 01:11:44,634 --> 01:11:46,557 (Cork pops) 936 01:12:04,904 --> 01:12:07,032 - To us. - To us. 937 01:12:09,742 --> 01:12:11,995 I went back to the house, and guess who... 938 01:12:12,161 --> 01:12:14,710 - (Glass breaks) - Let's make love! 939 01:12:15,832 --> 01:12:18,130 Well, if you absolutely insist. 940 01:12:18,292 --> 01:12:19,919 - No. - What? 941 01:12:20,086 --> 01:12:22,180 Here. On the rug. 942 01:12:23,297 --> 01:12:25,174 I'll be right back. 943 01:12:25,341 --> 01:12:27,685 Get undressed. 944 01:12:27,844 --> 01:12:30,097 Why not? 945 01:12:30,263 --> 01:12:32,311 Why not indeed? 946 01:12:34,141 --> 01:12:36,018 Afterwards... 947 01:12:36,185 --> 01:12:39,485 - Yeah? - ...let's go to South America. 948 01:12:39,647 --> 01:12:43,117 - What? - Let's fly to South America. 949 01:12:43,276 --> 01:12:46,530 - Why South America? - OK. Iceland? 950 01:12:50,157 --> 01:12:53,127 What do you really want out of life, Wanda? 951 01:12:53,286 --> 01:12:56,540 - I don't know. - Why do I like you so much? 952 01:12:56,664 --> 01:12:58,792 - Archie? - Mm? 953 01:12:59,458 --> 01:13:02,132 - Do you speak Italian? - I am Italian! 954 01:13:02,295 --> 01:13:04,093 Sono italiano in spirito. 955 01:13:04,213 --> 01:13:08,013 Ma ho sposato una donna che preferisce lavorare nel giardino 956 01:13:08,175 --> 01:13:12,897 a far l'amore appassionato. Uno sbaglio grande! 957 01:13:13,055 --> 01:13:16,025 But it's such an ugly language. 958 01:13:16,183 --> 01:13:18,060 How about... Russian? 959 01:13:18,477 --> 01:13:22,653 Yest' sila blagodatnaya sozvuchiy slov zhivykh. 960 01:13:22,815 --> 01:13:23,691 (Thud) 961 01:13:23,816 --> 01:13:29,949 Kamina tozhe ni trudnuyu tyesnitsya lyubosyat'sya grust'. 962 01:13:30,114 --> 01:13:35,621 Odnu molitvu chudnuyu tverzhdaya naizust'. 963 01:13:35,745 --> 01:13:41,297 V dushe kak bremya skatyatsya somneniya daleko. 964 01:13:41,417 --> 01:13:45,297 I varitsya i plachetsya, i tak legko... 965 01:13:45,463 --> 01:13:47,841 - Archie? - Yeah? 966 01:13:48,007 --> 01:13:50,681 - Are you rich? - No. No, I'm afraid not. 967 01:13:51,761 --> 01:13:54,310 - What about the house? - That's Wendy's. She's the rich one. 968 01:13:56,265 --> 01:13:57,858 Oh. 969 01:14:02,104 --> 01:14:05,699 Yest' sila blagodatnaya sozvuchiy slov shivykh. 970 01:14:05,858 --> 01:14:11,206 I tushit nyeponyatnaya, svetlaya, prelyestnaya rech'. 971 01:14:11,364 --> 01:14:16,165 V dushe kak bremya skatyatsya somneniya daleko. 972 01:14:16,327 --> 01:14:21,208 I varitsya i plachetsya, i tak legko! 973 01:14:21,374 --> 01:14:23,092 Leg... 974 01:14:39,350 --> 01:14:43,400 - What the hell are you doing? - I might ask you the same question! 975 01:14:45,022 --> 01:14:47,241 - Who are you? - What?! 976 01:14:47,400 --> 01:14:50,244 - Get your clothes on. - Will you leave, please? 977 01:14:50,403 --> 01:14:53,247 - What? - You're in the wrong flat. 978 01:14:53,406 --> 01:14:55,454 This flat belongs to Patrick Balfour. 979 01:14:55,616 --> 01:14:59,211 He's in Hong Kong and he lent me the key. Now get out! 980 01:14:59,370 --> 01:15:01,964 But we leased it from the agents last weekend. 981 01:15:07,837 --> 01:15:11,341 Yes, well, obviously that changes things a bit. Um... 982 01:15:12,883 --> 01:15:15,306 Aren't you Archie Leach? 983 01:15:16,220 --> 01:15:17,221 What? 984 01:15:17,388 --> 01:15:20,062 You bought our house in Lissendon Gardens. 985 01:15:21,225 --> 01:15:23,728 Hazel and Ian Johnson. 986 01:15:25,855 --> 01:15:28,358 What a coincidence! 987 01:15:28,524 --> 01:15:31,277 Ha. How nice to see you. 988 01:15:50,796 --> 01:15:52,514 (Dials number) 989 01:15:54,925 --> 01:15:57,019 (Phone rings) 990 01:16:01,432 --> 01:16:05,062 - Hello? - Hello, Wanda. It's Archie. 991 01:16:05,227 --> 01:16:09,403 Listen... I can't see you any more. I've got to end it. I'm sorry. 992 01:16:10,357 --> 01:16:12,109 What? 993 01:16:12,902 --> 01:16:14,495 I'm sorry. 994 01:16:15,780 --> 01:16:17,874 - (Hangs up) - Archie? 995 01:16:47,728 --> 01:16:49,526 Uh... 996 01:16:50,564 --> 01:16:53,033 - OK. - Oh, no, no. Please. 997 01:16:53,192 --> 01:16:56,162 - Look, I want to apologize. - I just finished it. 998 01:16:56,320 --> 01:16:58,493 OK, OK. Wait. Where are you going? 999 01:16:58,656 --> 01:17:02,331 - I wanna speak with you. - Will you leave me alone? 1000 01:17:02,451 --> 01:17:05,705 - Otto, I've just ended it. - Wait! I wanna say I'm sorry! 1001 01:17:05,871 --> 01:17:07,999 - It's all over, OK? - It's all right! 1002 01:17:08,124 --> 01:17:11,924 - Oh, Jesus Christ! - Will you calm down? Shut up! 1003 01:17:12,962 --> 01:17:14,885 - Please believe me! - It's all right! 1004 01:17:15,047 --> 01:17:17,596 No, don't beat me up again. I've had a terrible day. 1005 01:17:17,758 --> 01:17:21,228 - Will you shut up?! - Oh, Jesus Christ, don't kill me! 1006 01:17:21,345 --> 01:17:22,847 Shut up, then. 1007 01:17:23,764 --> 01:17:25,232 OK. 1008 01:17:25,391 --> 01:17:31,023 Look, I just want to apologize, sincerely, for... What? 1009 01:17:31,188 --> 01:17:34,738 Well, when I dangled you out the window. I'm really, really... 1010 01:17:34,900 --> 01:17:36,868 It was not a nice thing to do. 1011 01:17:37,027 --> 01:17:40,748 Then when I attacked you in there, well, I'm really, really s... 1012 01:17:40,906 --> 01:17:44,285 How could I know you were robbing your own house? I was trying to help! 1013 01:17:44,410 --> 01:17:48,290 - Yes. Thanks. Thanks, Otto. - I wanted you to trust me. 1014 01:17:48,455 --> 01:17:51,425 Yeah. Please. It was my fault. It was my fault. 1015 01:17:51,584 --> 01:17:53,052 - That's true. - Yeah. 1016 01:17:53,210 --> 01:17:55,508 - Now, about my sister. - Otto... 1017 01:17:55,671 --> 01:17:57,594 Look, she's a very sexy girl. 1018 01:17:57,756 --> 01:18:00,305 I understand you wanting to play around with her. 1019 01:18:00,467 --> 01:18:03,846 It's OK. I was wrong. I'm sorry I was jealous. 1020 01:18:04,013 --> 01:18:08,860 Just go ahead. Pork away, pal. Fuck her blue. 1021 01:18:09,643 --> 01:18:12,772 I like you, Archie. I just wanna help. 1022 01:18:38,422 --> 01:18:39,890 (Dog yaps) 1023 01:19:06,825 --> 01:19:08,953 (Rumbling) 1024 01:19:19,255 --> 01:19:20,472 Oh, God! 1025 01:19:36,730 --> 01:19:38,903 (Ken groans) 1026 01:19:57,668 --> 01:20:00,091 (Man) Send for an ambulance! 1027 01:20:17,354 --> 01:20:19,823 (Chuckles) 1028 01:20:19,982 --> 01:20:22,076 She copped it! 1029 01:20:25,696 --> 01:20:26,788 I did it! 1030 01:20:27,323 --> 01:20:28,825 I did it! 1031 01:20:28,991 --> 01:20:31,915 Unbe-fucking-lievable! 1032 01:20:32,077 --> 01:20:34,296 - Thomason! - Yeah? Oh. 1033 01:20:38,250 --> 01:20:40,719 You've done well, my son. 1034 01:20:41,670 --> 01:20:42,762 Now, here's the plan. 1035 01:20:42,921 --> 01:20:46,892 You get four tickets for this evening for Rio, first class. Then... 1036 01:20:47,051 --> 01:20:49,099 F-f-f... 1037 01:20:49,261 --> 01:20:51,935 Yeah, four. We get rid of Otto later. 1038 01:20:52,097 --> 01:20:55,067 Then back to the flat, pack, collect me. 1039 01:20:55,225 --> 01:20:58,775 Then to the Cathcart Towers Hotel to pick up the jewels. 1040 01:21:01,940 --> 01:21:06,446 Unbe-fucking-lievable! 1041 01:21:06,612 --> 01:21:07,864 Oi! Oi! 1042 01:21:08,697 --> 01:21:11,120 (Wanda hums the conga) 1043 01:21:11,283 --> 01:21:13,957 Oh, it's so exciting! I can't believe it! 1044 01:21:14,119 --> 01:21:15,962 He's s-s-safe. 1045 01:21:16,121 --> 01:21:19,250 - (Phone rings) - Oh! I'm gonna be late for court. 1046 01:21:21,335 --> 01:21:23,429 H-Hello. Oh, hello, Otto. 1047 01:21:25,798 --> 01:21:29,143 No. She just... left. 1048 01:21:29,301 --> 01:21:31,429 Oh, and Otto... 1049 01:21:31,595 --> 01:21:34,018 You owe me a p-p-p... 1050 01:21:36,058 --> 01:21:40,655 - What? - You owe me a p-pound. 1051 01:21:42,439 --> 01:21:44,362 Not Granny? 1052 01:21:44,525 --> 01:21:48,780 Met with an accident. 1053 01:21:49,530 --> 01:21:51,624 Bullshit! You're lying! 1054 01:21:53,325 --> 01:21:55,999 - Dead? - Heart attack. 1055 01:22:00,833 --> 01:22:05,339 - I don't believe this. - So George'll be out this afternoon. 1056 01:22:05,504 --> 01:22:10,260 We all go up to Heathrow, collect the loot, and then vvroooom! 1057 01:22:10,426 --> 01:22:16,308 All thanks to me. 1058 01:22:17,349 --> 01:22:19,647 So the loot's at the airport, is it, Ken? 1059 01:22:30,237 --> 01:22:32,365 What's h-happening? 1060 01:22:33,365 --> 01:22:35,538 Well, Ken... 1061 01:22:35,701 --> 01:22:39,126 I'm going to ask you some questions... while I eat my chips. 1062 01:22:40,205 --> 01:22:42,424 First. Who was the philosopher 1063 01:22:42,541 --> 01:22:47,718 who developed the concept of the superman in "Also sprach Zarathustra"? 1064 01:22:50,257 --> 01:22:51,804 No? 1065 01:22:51,967 --> 01:22:55,392 That's a chip up the nose, I'm afraid. 1066 01:22:55,554 --> 01:22:58,307 Friedrich Nietzsche. Next. 1067 01:22:58,432 --> 01:23:02,482 In which book did Nietzsche claim that almost all higher culture 1068 01:23:02,644 --> 01:23:04,396 is based on cruelty? 1069 01:23:07,357 --> 01:23:11,533 - Are you thinking or in mid-stutter? - You're m-m-mad. 1070 01:23:12,696 --> 01:23:14,869 "Beyond Good and Evil." 1071 01:23:16,742 --> 01:23:20,542 Guess I'll have to ask you an easy one, huh, Ken? OK. Um... 1072 01:23:21,246 --> 01:23:23,624 Let me think, let me think. Um... 1073 01:23:23,790 --> 01:23:25,508 Where are the diamonds? 1074 01:23:26,835 --> 01:23:30,715 I'll give you a clue. Somewhere around the airport. 1075 01:23:31,798 --> 01:23:33,766 I'm n-n-n... 1076 01:23:33,926 --> 01:23:35,394 No hassle. There's plenty of time. 1077 01:23:35,761 --> 01:23:39,061 I'll just sit here and eat my chips till you tell me. 1078 01:23:41,767 --> 01:23:46,193 The English contribution to world cuisine: the chip. 1079 01:23:47,481 --> 01:23:51,952 What do the English usually eat with chips to make them more interesting? 1080 01:23:53,779 --> 01:23:55,827 Wait a moment! 1081 01:23:56,949 --> 01:23:59,498 It's fish. Isn't it? 1082 01:24:04,122 --> 01:24:05,965 Oh! Here, boy. 1083 01:24:06,124 --> 01:24:08,468 Down the hatch. 1084 01:24:09,044 --> 01:24:11,593 (Ken gasps) 1085 01:24:11,755 --> 01:24:15,385 - Delicious! - You b-b-b... 1086 01:24:15,509 --> 01:24:18,353 Better eat the green one? OK. 1087 01:24:18,512 --> 01:24:20,480 What's this one's name? 1088 01:24:20,847 --> 01:24:24,602 Well, not Wanda, anyway. I'm going to call her Lunch. 1089 01:24:24,893 --> 01:24:27,191 Hello, Lunch. Hello! 1090 01:24:31,984 --> 01:24:33,952 Eww! 1091 01:24:34,111 --> 01:24:37,285 Avoid the green ones. They're not ripe yet. 1092 01:24:39,741 --> 01:24:43,962 Now, you were in court, Inspector, when the forensic evidence was read? 1093 01:24:44,121 --> 01:24:45,338 Yes, sir. 1094 01:24:45,497 --> 01:24:49,377 The fact that Mr. Thomason was installing windows the previous weekend 1095 01:24:49,543 --> 01:24:51,420 would account, would it not, Inspector, 1096 01:24:51,545 --> 01:24:55,175 for the presence of small particles of glass 1097 01:24:55,340 --> 01:24:57,434 on his trousers? 1098 01:24:59,011 --> 01:25:02,356 No hurry, Inspector. Please do take your time. 1099 01:25:09,479 --> 01:25:11,573 I'm almost full. 1100 01:25:13,191 --> 01:25:15,614 - Almost. - Stop! 1101 01:25:15,777 --> 01:25:17,700 Please, don't. 1102 01:25:18,363 --> 01:25:21,583 Come on, Wanda! Gullet time! 1103 01:25:24,286 --> 01:25:28,007 What are the names of those hotels by the airport? What are they? 1104 01:25:28,165 --> 01:25:31,294 The Airway Sheraton? The Post House? The Cathcart Towers? 1105 01:25:31,710 --> 01:25:33,929 The Cathcart Towers?! Yes?! 1106 01:25:35,756 --> 01:25:38,009 Mm? Mm? 1107 01:25:38,508 --> 01:25:41,011 - Yes. - In a safe deposit box? 1108 01:25:41,678 --> 01:25:44,022 - Yes. - (Muffled) Where's the key? 1109 01:25:44,181 --> 01:25:46,354 - What? - Where's the key? 1110 01:25:46,475 --> 01:25:49,024 It's in the t-t-tank. 1111 01:25:50,812 --> 01:25:52,359 Where? Where? 1112 01:25:52,522 --> 01:25:54,524 In the t-t-t... 1113 01:25:54,691 --> 01:25:56,568 Treasure chest! 1114 01:26:01,031 --> 01:26:02,624 Where?! 1115 01:26:03,742 --> 01:26:05,710 Where? 1116 01:26:07,996 --> 01:26:12,092 You m-m-murdering... 1117 01:26:12,250 --> 01:26:14,548 I'm g-g-gonna k-k-k... 1118 01:26:14,711 --> 01:26:16,679 I'll kill you! I'll kill you! 1119 01:26:19,716 --> 01:26:22,560 Sorry, Ken, but your answer was incorrect. 1120 01:26:24,096 --> 01:26:27,145 Still, you really did think it was in there, didn't you? 1121 01:26:27,265 --> 01:26:28,858 (Snorts) 1122 01:26:29,017 --> 01:26:30,394 What? 1123 01:26:31,812 --> 01:26:32,734 Oh. 1124 01:26:32,896 --> 01:26:34,898 (Inhales desperately) 1125 01:26:40,779 --> 01:26:42,656 - Hello? - I know where the diamonds are. 1126 01:26:44,866 --> 01:26:46,960 - Where? - Where's the key? 1127 01:26:50,956 --> 01:26:54,210 - I've got it. - How soon can you get to George's? 1128 01:26:55,794 --> 01:26:57,922 You are Wanda Gershwitz, 1129 01:26:58,046 --> 01:27:01,846 of Kipling Mansions, Murray Road, London, West 9? 1130 01:27:03,135 --> 01:27:05,763 - Yes. - Now, will you tell the court, please, 1131 01:27:05,887 --> 01:27:08,265 how do you know the defendant? 1132 01:27:08,432 --> 01:27:10,935 We've had a relationship for two years. 1133 01:27:11,977 --> 01:27:13,570 Relationship? 1134 01:27:14,980 --> 01:27:16,698 We're lovers, your lord. 1135 01:27:17,816 --> 01:27:22,913 (Clears throat) Miss Gershwitz, on the fourth of March of this year, 1136 01:27:23,071 --> 01:27:25,165 in the morning, where were you? 1137 01:27:25,323 --> 01:27:28,918 - I was at the apartment at Murray Road. - Were you by yourself, 1138 01:27:29,077 --> 01:27:31,375 or was there anyone else present? 1139 01:27:31,538 --> 01:27:34,838 - No. Somebody else was there. - Who was that? 1140 01:27:35,000 --> 01:27:38,174 - My brother. - And did your...? 1141 01:27:41,757 --> 01:27:43,851 Your brother? 1142 01:27:45,969 --> 01:27:48,017 My brother. 1143 01:27:49,014 --> 01:27:50,641 Yes. 1144 01:27:51,725 --> 01:27:56,822 Yes, and... are you quite sure it was your brother? 1145 01:27:56,938 --> 01:28:00,568 Mr. Leach, I'm sure Ms. Gershwitz can recognize her brother. 1146 01:28:00,734 --> 01:28:03,328 She's had a relationship with him all her life. 1147 01:28:03,487 --> 01:28:05,489 (Chuckles) 1148 01:28:05,655 --> 01:28:07,202 Much obliged, my lord. 1149 01:28:07,365 --> 01:28:11,620 Was there anyone else present that morning? 1150 01:28:11,745 --> 01:28:13,622 - George was there. - Thank you. 1151 01:28:13,789 --> 01:28:16,087 - But he left about five to seven. - Wanda! 1152 01:28:17,709 --> 01:28:21,464 I wonder... 1153 01:28:23,548 --> 01:28:25,642 I wonder... 1154 01:28:34,226 --> 01:28:36,103 Yes, Mr. Leach? 1155 01:28:36,561 --> 01:28:39,485 I Wendy... I Wanda... I wonder... I w-w-w... 1156 01:28:39,648 --> 01:28:43,118 Wh-when you say five to seven, 1157 01:28:43,276 --> 01:28:48,032 Ms. Gershwitz... how can you be so sure? 1158 01:28:48,532 --> 01:28:52,537 Oh, I looked at the clock. 'Cause I was saying to myself, 1159 01:28:52,702 --> 01:28:55,876 "Where could he be going at five to seven with that shotgun?" 1160 01:28:56,039 --> 01:28:58,041 Darling! 1161 01:28:58,208 --> 01:29:00,302 Mr. Leach. "Darling"? 1162 01:29:00,418 --> 01:29:04,889 - Yes, dear? - You bitch! You fucking bitch! 1163 01:29:05,048 --> 01:29:07,642 (Wanda screams) 1164 01:29:08,760 --> 01:29:10,854 (Judge) Restrain that man! 1165 01:29:16,601 --> 01:29:19,946 - Restrain this man. - Come here, you bastard! 1166 01:29:20,105 --> 01:29:23,279 Clear the court! I'm adjourning this matter for an hour. 1167 01:29:23,441 --> 01:29:26,285 Clear the court! Clear the court! 1168 01:29:34,536 --> 01:29:37,631 Clear the court! Clear the court! Clear the court! 1169 01:29:37,789 --> 01:29:40,508 Officers, arrest that man! 1170 01:29:45,922 --> 01:29:48,971 Clear the court! Clear the court! 1171 01:29:59,895 --> 01:30:02,489 (Wendy) Bloody hell! 1172 01:30:02,647 --> 01:30:05,651 It's my husband. He's been hit. 1173 01:30:05,817 --> 01:30:09,162 Ah, you made it. Good. Bit of a knock, I'm afraid. 1174 01:30:10,488 --> 01:30:13,412 I have never been so humiliated in my life. 1175 01:30:13,575 --> 01:30:17,045 You can stick this marriage right in your bottom! 1176 01:30:17,203 --> 01:30:19,626 I'll see you in court. 1177 01:30:28,131 --> 01:30:29,508 Yes. 1178 01:30:31,259 --> 01:30:32,511 Well. 1179 01:30:33,428 --> 01:30:34,930 That's it, then. 1180 01:30:39,059 --> 01:30:40,402 - George? - What? 1181 01:30:40,560 --> 01:30:45,031 - We've got to talk. - Tell those pigs to fuck off! 1182 01:30:45,190 --> 01:30:47,318 Fuck off, pigs. 1183 01:30:49,361 --> 01:30:52,205 Did you hear what I said? Fuck off. 1184 01:30:58,119 --> 01:31:00,963 - What's she up to, George? - What are you up to? 1185 01:31:01,122 --> 01:31:05,047 You called her darling... and Wanda. 1186 01:31:05,210 --> 01:31:09,636 I've been helping her get her evidence straight, you berk. It slipped out. 1187 01:31:09,798 --> 01:31:12,096 - You been coaching her? - What do you think?! 1188 01:31:12,258 --> 01:31:15,387 We've got ten minutes. They're gonna find you guilty, right? 1189 01:31:15,553 --> 01:31:18,898 Plead guilty, tell them where the loot is, you may get away with... 1190 01:31:19,057 --> 01:31:21,526 ...eight years, out in five and a half. 1191 01:31:21,685 --> 01:31:23,983 What if I tell 'em about Otto... and Wanda? 1192 01:31:25,146 --> 01:31:26,398 - They both did it? - Yeah. 1193 01:31:26,564 --> 01:31:29,408 Great. All right. Maybe six years, out in four? 1194 01:31:30,360 --> 01:31:32,362 So where are the diamonds? 1195 01:31:33,613 --> 01:31:37,584 - Where's Bartlett? - He's upstairs. So, where are they? 1196 01:31:38,493 --> 01:31:41,337 Tell Bartlett Ken knows where they are. 1197 01:31:42,747 --> 01:31:46,092 George, it'd be a lot quicker if you told me. 1198 01:31:48,253 --> 01:31:50,426 OK. I'll tell Bartlett. 1199 01:31:50,588 --> 01:31:53,592 - Where's Ken? - He's at the flat. 1200 01:31:57,012 --> 01:31:59,561 (Wanda wails) 1201 01:31:59,723 --> 01:32:03,444 (Tearfully) Thank you for all your help. I'll be right out. 1202 01:32:17,449 --> 01:32:18,951 Taxi! Taxi! 1203 01:32:19,117 --> 01:32:20,243 Please. Shit! 1204 01:32:20,410 --> 01:32:22,504 - Taxi! - Come on. 1205 01:32:22,662 --> 01:32:23,788 - What? - Let's go. 1206 01:32:23,955 --> 01:32:25,423 - Where? - Buenos Aires. 1207 01:32:25,582 --> 01:32:28,756 - What? - We're going to George's flat first. 1208 01:32:28,918 --> 01:32:30,420 Get in. 1209 01:32:33,965 --> 01:32:35,888 - Got your passport? - Yeah. 1210 01:32:36,051 --> 01:32:38,349 Check the briefcase for mine. 1211 01:32:38,511 --> 01:32:41,105 Get your head down. 1212 01:32:45,769 --> 01:32:49,490 So, you robbed the jeweler's, turned one lover over to the police, 1213 01:32:49,647 --> 01:32:54,494 kept one to help you find the diamonds, and when he does, you commit perjury. 1214 01:32:54,652 --> 01:32:58,373 - Everybody does it in America. - Not in this country they don't! 1215 01:32:58,531 --> 01:33:01,831 Like nobody lies in England. Like Margaret Thatcher never lies. 1216 01:33:01,993 --> 01:33:05,497 - You lied to me from the start. - You just wanted to get me into bed. 1217 01:33:05,663 --> 01:33:07,506 I fell in love with you! 1218 01:33:13,505 --> 01:33:15,348 How come you dumped me, then? 1219 01:33:16,841 --> 01:33:18,843 I wasn't rich enough. Remember? 1220 01:33:30,480 --> 01:33:32,699 - Say something in Russian. - No! 1221 01:33:38,029 --> 01:33:41,124 - What are you thinking? - I'm trying to think of a reason 1222 01:33:41,282 --> 01:33:43,705 why I should take you to South America with me. 1223 01:33:44,619 --> 01:33:49,295 How about... because I have the key to the safety deposit box? 1224 01:33:51,084 --> 01:33:52,711 - That's a good reason! - Good reason. 1225 01:33:57,048 --> 01:33:59,722 - What do we do about Otto? - I'll handle Otto. 1226 01:33:59,884 --> 01:34:02,137 Be careful, he's dangerous. 1227 01:34:02,303 --> 01:34:04,305 So am I. 1228 01:34:04,472 --> 01:34:06,566 Keep it running. 1229 01:34:09,102 --> 01:34:10,854 Why'd you bring him? 1230 01:34:10,979 --> 01:34:13,698 - No! - I'm beginning to think you like him! 1231 01:34:13,857 --> 01:34:15,029 Let's get the diamonds! 1232 01:34:15,900 --> 01:34:17,197 Ken? 1233 01:34:17,360 --> 01:34:19,408 Are you Ke...? 1234 01:34:21,114 --> 01:34:23,617 How do you do? I'm George's barrister. 1235 01:34:24,534 --> 01:34:26,832 - What's happened? - (Crash) 1236 01:34:27,412 --> 01:34:29,631 - Oh, my God... - (Otto) Asshole! 1237 01:34:30,623 --> 01:34:32,967 - What the bloody hell do you think...? - (Gunshot) 1238 01:34:33,126 --> 01:34:35,220 All right, then. 1239 01:34:35,336 --> 01:34:37,088 Archie! 1240 01:34:38,923 --> 01:34:41,267 Where have they gone? Quick! 1241 01:34:41,426 --> 01:34:44,100 They've g... They've g... They've g... 1242 01:34:44,262 --> 01:34:46,185 What? 1243 01:34:46,973 --> 01:34:49,271 Are you all right? 1244 01:34:49,434 --> 01:34:52,654 - Where have they gone? - They've gone to the Ca-ca-ca... 1245 01:34:52,812 --> 01:34:54,610 - Are you ill? - No, no, no. 1246 01:34:54,772 --> 01:34:56,774 - What? - The Ca-ca-ca... 1247 01:34:56,941 --> 01:35:00,616 - Have you got a stutter? - Y-y-yeah. A b-b-bit. 1248 01:35:00,778 --> 01:35:04,828 OK, fine. Don't worry, don't worry. Do you know where they've gone? 1249 01:35:04,991 --> 01:35:07,164 - Y-y-y... - Fine, fine. Where? 1250 01:35:08,286 --> 01:35:10,254 The Ca... 1251 01:35:10,413 --> 01:35:12,165 Hotel. 1252 01:35:12,332 --> 01:35:14,460 Hotel? Which hotel? 1253 01:35:16,294 --> 01:35:17,841 Ca... 1254 01:35:18,004 --> 01:35:20,052 The Ca... The Ca... 1255 01:35:20,173 --> 01:35:21,641 - The... - Go on. 1256 01:35:21,799 --> 01:35:23,392 Ca-ca-ca... 1257 01:35:23,551 --> 01:35:26,555 All right. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. 1258 01:35:26,721 --> 01:35:28,689 Slowly. Very slowly. 1259 01:35:29,390 --> 01:35:31,017 Slowly. 1260 01:35:32,936 --> 01:35:34,313 The C... 1261 01:35:35,104 --> 01:35:36,572 The Ca... 1262 01:35:38,191 --> 01:35:40,319 The C... 1263 01:35:40,485 --> 01:35:41,702 The Ca... 1264 01:35:41,861 --> 01:35:44,705 - No hurry. - The C-C-Ca... 1265 01:35:44,864 --> 01:35:47,617 - Sing it. Sing. - ♪ The Ca... 1266 01:35:48,993 --> 01:35:51,997 ♪ The Ca... The Ca... The Ca... 1267 01:35:54,207 --> 01:35:56,084 - ♪ Ca... - Plenty of time. 1268 01:35:56,251 --> 01:35:58,174 ♪ Ca... 1269 01:35:58,336 --> 01:36:00,304 ♪ Ca... The Ca... 1270 01:36:00,630 --> 01:36:03,429 Oh, come on! Sorry. I'm sorry. 1271 01:36:03,549 --> 01:36:06,098 Um... All right, wait. 1272 01:36:06,261 --> 01:36:08,355 ♪ The Ca... The... 1273 01:36:10,890 --> 01:36:12,984 Here. Write it. 1274 01:36:24,112 --> 01:36:26,661 - Cathcart Towers Hotel? - Cathcart Towers Hotel. 1275 01:36:26,823 --> 01:36:29,246 Where is it? 1276 01:36:29,409 --> 01:36:31,286 Ken, where is it? Where?! 1277 01:36:31,452 --> 01:36:33,546 He-He-He... 1278 01:36:33,705 --> 01:36:35,548 Here. Here. Again. No? 1279 01:36:35,707 --> 01:36:37,755 (Ken whistles) 1280 01:36:41,421 --> 01:36:43,139 (Ken makes whirring noises) 1281 01:36:43,298 --> 01:36:44,299 Heathrow Airport. 1282 01:36:55,643 --> 01:36:57,566 - (Car horn) - Hey! 1283 01:36:57,729 --> 01:36:59,402 What's the idea? You can't stay... 1284 01:36:59,564 --> 01:37:01,817 Frightfully sorry. Take it, it's yours. 1285 01:37:09,699 --> 01:37:12,873 Thank you so much. Uh... British Airways to Rio? 1286 01:37:13,036 --> 01:37:15,789 - Rio? Terminal Four, sir. - Thank you. 1287 01:37:22,628 --> 01:37:24,426 Excuse me, sir. Is this your vehicle? 1288 01:37:24,589 --> 01:37:26,637 With you in a moment. I'll be right back. 1289 01:37:28,718 --> 01:37:31,141 Aisle or window? Smoking or nonsmoking? 1290 01:37:32,055 --> 01:37:34,934 - What was the middle one? - Anything in nonsmoking. 1291 01:37:35,099 --> 01:37:37,568 Gate 14 is boarding now. 1292 01:37:59,874 --> 01:38:01,171 Rio! 1293 01:38:02,418 --> 01:38:05,262 Otto, don't look back. There's a cop right behind us. 1294 01:38:05,421 --> 01:38:07,344 Quick! 1295 01:38:10,927 --> 01:38:13,897 - Yes, we can just do it, Mr. Leach. - Great. 1296 01:38:14,055 --> 01:38:15,682 - Luggage? - (Thud) 1297 01:38:18,851 --> 01:38:20,853 Don't really need any. 1298 01:38:21,020 --> 01:38:22,317 - Gate 14. - Thank you. 1299 01:38:24,482 --> 01:38:26,610 Ciao, stupidissimo. 1300 01:38:32,907 --> 01:38:35,581 (Ken grunts and groans and wails) 1301 01:38:46,337 --> 01:38:48,840 (Gunshots) 1302 01:38:56,722 --> 01:38:59,396 Come on, Archie. Pick up the phone. 1303 01:39:06,941 --> 01:39:10,366 Sir! Airport security. May I see your boarding pass, please? 1304 01:39:10,528 --> 01:39:12,622 Oh, yes. Certainly, certainly. 1305 01:39:13,406 --> 01:39:15,955 Very good. Would you step over here, please? 1306 01:39:16,117 --> 01:39:18,870 - Um, yes, of course. - Oh, look! The Queen. 1307 01:39:24,459 --> 01:39:27,804 OK, OK, OK, OK. Don't get excited. OK, OK, OK. 1308 01:39:30,381 --> 01:39:33,055 Oh, it's you! I was actually worried there. 1309 01:39:33,176 --> 01:39:34,928 - Keep your hands up. - No! 1310 01:39:35,052 --> 01:39:37,054 - Put 'em up! - I'll make a deal with you. 1311 01:39:37,221 --> 01:39:40,851 - I'll put one up. - Put the other one up! 1312 01:39:42,143 --> 01:39:44,362 Which looks better? 1313 01:39:44,479 --> 01:39:46,402 I'm warning you, Otto. 1314 01:39:47,190 --> 01:39:51,070 What are you gonna do? Shoot me? Gun me down in cold blood like a dog? 1315 01:39:51,235 --> 01:39:55,081 Hey! If you wanna settle something with me, why don't you fight me? 1316 01:39:55,239 --> 01:39:58,334 You're a man, aren't you? Let's fight like men! Come on! 1317 01:40:00,369 --> 01:40:02,463 - All right. - All right, then. 1318 01:40:03,289 --> 01:40:05,212 - OK. - OK. 1319 01:40:06,292 --> 01:40:09,466 - You look good, Arch. - I used to box for Oxford. 1320 01:40:09,629 --> 01:40:12,508 Oh, yeah? Well, I used to kill for the CIA. 1321 01:40:12,673 --> 01:40:15,301 Now, get your hands up. 1322 01:40:15,468 --> 01:40:16,640 No. 1323 01:40:18,679 --> 01:40:21,478 (Chuckles) You spineless bimbo. 1324 01:40:22,266 --> 01:40:23,734 Now, out. 1325 01:40:28,231 --> 01:40:30,609 I'm gonna have to shoot you now. 1326 01:40:30,775 --> 01:40:33,324 But I've got a little time before my plane leaves 1327 01:40:33,486 --> 01:40:37,161 and I'm longing to humiliate you. So get in that barrel. 1328 01:40:40,159 --> 01:40:42,787 - What? - In the barrel. 1329 01:40:46,165 --> 01:40:48,088 Right. 1330 01:40:50,545 --> 01:40:53,799 You English, you think you're so superior, don't you? 1331 01:40:53,923 --> 01:40:56,472 Well, you're the filth of the planet. 1332 01:40:56,592 --> 01:41:01,268 A bunch of pompous, badly-dressed, poverty-stricken, 1333 01:41:01,430 --> 01:41:04,024 sexually-repressed football hooligans. 1334 01:41:06,185 --> 01:41:07,687 Goodbye, Archie. 1335 01:41:08,312 --> 01:41:10,314 At least we're not irretrievably vulgar. 1336 01:41:10,439 --> 01:41:12,942 You know your problem? You don't like winners. 1337 01:41:13,067 --> 01:41:15,115 - Winners? - Yeah. 1338 01:41:15,278 --> 01:41:18,282 - Winners. - Winners like... North Vietnam? 1339 01:41:18,406 --> 01:41:20,249 Shut up! 1340 01:41:20,408 --> 01:41:22,786 We did not lose Vietnam! It was a tie! 1341 01:41:22,910 --> 01:41:25,834 (American accent) They kicked some ass there. 1342 01:41:25,997 --> 01:41:30,673 Boy, they whupped your hide real good! 1343 01:41:31,210 --> 01:41:32,883 - No, they didn't. - Yes, they did. 1344 01:41:33,004 --> 01:41:35,678 - Oh, no, they didn't. - Oh, yes, they did. 1345 01:41:35,798 --> 01:41:38,392 Oh, no, they... Shut up! 1346 01:41:39,635 --> 01:41:42,184 - Goodbye, Archie. - Gonna shoot me? 1347 01:41:42,346 --> 01:41:45,771 (English accent) Uh, yes. Yes, 'fraid so, old chap. Sorry! 1348 01:41:46,267 --> 01:41:47,860 Look, Otto! Look! 1349 01:41:55,234 --> 01:41:57,202 Rev-v-venge! 1350 01:41:57,320 --> 01:41:59,414 (Laughs) 1351 01:42:00,948 --> 01:42:04,623 It's K-K-Ken, c-c-coming to k-k-kill me. 1352 01:42:06,162 --> 01:42:08,961 How are you gonna c-c-catch me, K-K-Ken? 1353 01:42:11,626 --> 01:42:14,049 Now, where was I? Oh, yeah. 1354 01:42:16,088 --> 01:42:18,011 Shit! God! 1355 01:42:19,592 --> 01:42:22,766 Stupid fucking limey cement! Ugh! 1356 01:42:30,311 --> 01:42:32,063 Ken! Ken! 1357 01:42:32,229 --> 01:42:34,732 Wait. Wait, Ken! Kenny! K... 1358 01:42:34,899 --> 01:42:37,527 - May I call you Kenny? - Remember Wanda! 1359 01:42:37,693 --> 01:42:40,537 I got the deal of a lifetime! 50-50, you and me. What do you say? 1360 01:42:40,655 --> 01:42:44,580 OK, OK, OK. 60-40. That's my final offer. 1361 01:42:44,742 --> 01:42:48,121 - Revenge! - Wait. I got an idea. You take it all. 1362 01:42:48,287 --> 01:42:50,756 Yeah. Here's my boarding pass. Ken! 1363 01:42:51,248 --> 01:42:53,876 I'm gonna... I'm gonna k-k-kill you. 1364 01:42:54,001 --> 01:42:57,130 OK, fine. Fine, Ken. Come at me. Gimme your best shot. 1365 01:42:57,630 --> 01:43:00,759 Go on, Ken! You don't have the guts. Admit it! 1366 01:43:02,927 --> 01:43:05,897 OK, you have the guts. Good. Wait. 1367 01:43:06,013 --> 01:43:07,515 Death! 1368 01:43:07,640 --> 01:43:10,689 All right. I'm sorry I ate your fish, OK? 1369 01:43:10,810 --> 01:43:13,689 - I'm sorry! - Revenge! 1370 01:43:13,854 --> 01:43:15,948 Jesus! I said I'm sorry. What the fu...? 1371 01:43:16,107 --> 01:43:18,405 (Screams) 1372 01:43:20,820 --> 01:43:22,197 Got him! 1373 01:43:33,124 --> 01:43:35,798 Got you again! You bastard! 1374 01:43:36,460 --> 01:43:39,430 Hey. I've lost my stutter. 1375 01:43:39,588 --> 01:43:42,592 It's gone. I can speak. 1376 01:43:42,758 --> 01:43:44,977 How much wood could a woodchuck chuck 1377 01:43:45,136 --> 01:43:47,138 if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 1378 01:43:48,806 --> 01:43:51,776 Oh, good afternoon, sir. Boarding pass? 1379 01:43:59,358 --> 01:44:01,452 Buongiorno, signorina. 1380 01:44:10,119 --> 01:44:12,167 Now, listen. Two things. One... 1381 01:44:13,497 --> 01:44:17,001 Behave yourself from now on, or I'll break your neck. OK? 1382 01:44:18,002 --> 01:44:19,219 Two... 1383 01:44:20,504 --> 01:44:22,097 Gorbachev. 1384 01:44:22,256 --> 01:44:24,008 Glasnost. 1385 01:44:24,175 --> 01:44:26,678 Molotov. 1386 01:44:26,844 --> 01:44:28,721 Blinis. 1387 01:44:28,888 --> 01:44:31,016 Uh... Lenin. 1388 01:44:31,932 --> 01:44:33,354 (Archie) Pushkin. 1389 01:44:33,476 --> 01:44:36,855 - Chicken Kiev. - Good. Dostoyevsky. 1390 01:44:38,272 --> 01:44:40,024 Roubles. 1391 01:44:41,484 --> 01:44:43,407 (Archie) Vladivostok. 1392 01:44:43,569 --> 01:44:45,663 (Engines roar) 1393 01:44:47,865 --> 01:44:50,539 Assho-o-o-o-o-o-o-ole! 102538